MoDerBro's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 27 Jul, 2016 @ 8:48am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:24pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 27 Jul, 2016 @ 8:43am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 22 Oct, 2016 @ 10:05pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:10pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2016 @ 8:02am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:11pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:53pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 7:03pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 8:06pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 9:06pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2016 @ 4:32am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 17 Oct, 2016 @ 1:38am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2016 @ 7:11am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 23 Oct, 2016 @ 8:55pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2016 @ 8:18am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 17 Oct, 2016 @ 1:17am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 22 Aug, 2016 @ 7:25pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 11 Dec, 2016 @ 9:05pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 11 Aug, 2016 @ 11:01pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 20 Oct, 2016 @ 6:08am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 22 Aug, 2016 @ 7:54pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 17 Oct, 2016 @ 1:17am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 7:48pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 25 Oct, 2016 @ 5:54pm

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked 5 Dec, 2016 @ 6:03pm

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Unlocked 5 Dec, 2016 @ 6:03pm

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 5 Dec, 2016 @ 6:03pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 17 Oct, 2016 @ 8:33pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 23 Oct, 2016 @ 8:33pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:29pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 8:41pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 7:05pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 22 Oct, 2016 @ 10:03pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2016 @ 8:21am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 13 Aug, 2016 @ 2:09am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 27 Jul, 2016 @ 8:45am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2016 @ 6:21pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 27 Jul, 2016 @ 8:49am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2016 @ 8:21am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 17 Oct, 2016 @ 2:18am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2016 @ 7:02pm

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2016 @ 11:12pm

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 16 Oct, 2016 @ 2:57am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2016 @ 4:33am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 11 Aug, 2016 @ 11:01pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 12 Aug, 2016 @ 12:35am

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.

Unlocked 6 Aug, 2016 @ 4:50am

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.

Unlocked 11 Aug, 2016 @ 11:54pm

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 12 Aug, 2016 @ 12:33am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 23 Oct, 2016 @ 6:07am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 4 Aug, 2016 @ 6:56pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

7 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

10 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

1 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

18 / 30

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

6 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

9 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

4 / 30