Blowing people up is a well trained art of explosives, espionage and a little bit of being Psycho. In the first part of this guide, I'll teach you how to plant the bomb and get all the female gamers to faun over you as much as you could ever want.

First thing is first, going off my past guide, you probably know how to shoot the gun and buy the gear so I will not cover any of that. I will however, talk about the bomb again.

Now you can see, there are two things on the minimap now. Those are letters, NOW THAT WE'VE PASSED BASIC KINDERGARDEN WE CAN MOVE ON TO MORE PRESSING MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE BOMB SITES ARE THE ONLY PLACES YOU CAN PUT DOWN THIS GLORIOUS LOOKING PIECE OF AMERICAN JUSTICE. THEN THERE WILL BE BOOM. AND MANY MANY FAN GIRLS OF MY GLORIOUS PECKS.


BUT FIRST WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH BART.


HE WAS A SNITCH.


NOW WE DEAL WITH THOSE DIRTY COPS TRYING TO MAKE SOME CRACK MONEY OFF OF THIS GLORIOUS MASTERPIECE OF AMERICAN INGENUITY.



Now that the bomb site is clear, we need to plant the bomb, which as you may know is just holding down the left mouse button.

IF YOU DON'T KNOW GO BACK AND READ MY OTHER GUIDE YOU DUMB ♥♥♥♥. HERE HAVE A VISUAL REPRESENTATION OF WHAT YOU'LL SEE WHILE HOLDING DOWN LEFT CLICK.


FANTASTIC, NOW DON'T LET ANYONE DEFUSE IT AND GET A MILLION MILES AWAY.


NOW PREFORM THIS IN FRONT OF ALL THE GAMER GIRLS. CHICKS DIG A GUY WHO KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOING. DON'T BELIEVE ME?

YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE GOING TO BE READING THIS GUIDE, SO OTHER PEOPLE WILL TRY TO DO THIS TACTIC ON YOU AND GET GIRLS FOR THEMSELVES. SO HERE, LET'S LEARN HOW TO DEFEND AGAINST THOSE COPY CATS AND STOP THE MENACE OF BART ONCE AGAIN, SPEAKING OF BART.






NOW THAT BART IS OUT OF THE PICTURE, LETS GET TO DEFENDING


It is generally a good idea to work with your team on Counter Terrorist sides, as if you all go B and they plant at A, they'll generally have a good way of turtling down and you'll throw your bodies against a wall. Split your team up evenly and work in pairs, with one sniper floating at the longest possible shooting range.

OR YOU CAN BE LIKE ME AND GO SOLOAUTOSHOTGUN TO GET EVEN MORE CHICKS.

THERES A GUY BEHIND ME, HE MIGHT'VE GOTTEN THE SLIP IF HE WASN'T SO SUCK.

Now we defuse the bomb.

Defusing the bomb is quite an ordeal to do, considering that it takes 10 seconds to defuse without a kit, compared to 5 seconds with one. So remember,

BUY A ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KIT IF YOU HAVE THE MONEY

NOW REVEL IN MORE SKILL LOVING FEMALES

Using a Rifle is a very nice thing to have in medium to long range encounters. Sometimes they can turn the tide of war in an instant, depending on your skill. For this section we'll be using the Famas.


NOW REMEMBER WHAT I AM ABOUT TO SAY

CROUCH

AIM FOR THE UPPER BODY AND HEAD

SHOOT LIKE NUTS

IF THEY'RE NOT PLASTERED AGAINST THE WALL WITH LEAD, YOU ♥♥♥♥♥♥ UP



Next up is the SMG



What, did you want a picture?


♥♥♥♥ YOU

Using an SMG is quite simple, hold down left click while aiming at them and jump like mad. Practice using the bison against bots and you'll become the scum of the earth and from there, you'll be ready to play Counter Strike on Competitive mode.



What, did you want another picture?

I'M ALL ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ OUT YOU SCUMLORDS GO TO THE NEXT PANE

I HOPE YOU LEARNED SOMETHING, BECAUSE I DIDN'T. I ALREADY KNEW ALL THIS STUFF YOU ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ PRICKS BECAUSE I'M GREAT.



Remember to check out my other guide and RATE COMMENT SUBSCRIBE


ALRIGHT THAT'S IT

I'M ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ DONE

TURN OFF THE TRANSCRIBE YOU CRETIN

GOD ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ DAMN IT DON'T MAKE ME COME IN THERE

I WILL RIP YOUR HEAD OFF YOU SON OF A