WishICouldWin's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 11:49am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 1 Nov, 2021 @ 6:01am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 7:30pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 1 Nov, 2021 @ 5:42am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 31 Oct, 2021 @ 9:28am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 1 Nov, 2021 @ 6:14am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 2 Nov, 2021 @ 11:24am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 30 Dec, 2021 @ 11:41am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2021 @ 1:51pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 2:41pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 8:20pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 7:20pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 31 Oct, 2022 @ 8:55pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2021 @ 1:27pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 2:44pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 3 Jan, 2022 @ 8:08pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 8:10pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 30 Dec, 2021 @ 11:39am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 8:28pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 26 Jan, 2022 @ 12:05pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 11:05pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 2 Nov, 2021 @ 11:35am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 31 Oct, 2021 @ 9:29am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 31 Oct, 2021 @ 8:41am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 29 Dec, 2021 @ 10:45am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 28 Jan, 2022 @ 2:23am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 2 Nov, 2021 @ 11:35am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 12:14am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 11:28am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 2:35pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 8:48pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 7 Jan, 2022 @ 8:20pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.

Unlocked 1 Jan, 2022 @ 8:35pm

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 11:19am

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.

Unlocked 26 Jan, 2022 @ 12:18pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 2:01pm

Ode to Eddings

Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units.

Unlocked 2 Jan, 2022 @ 5:21pm

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked 3 Jan, 2022 @ 8:30pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 3 Jan, 2022 @ 7:31pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

6 / 30

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

21 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

4 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

0 / 30

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

18 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

2 / 10

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

5 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

2 / 3

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

8 / 30

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

27 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

18 / 30