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Recent reviews by BylliGoat

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Showing 21-30 of 83 entries
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
257.6 hrs on record (37.5 hrs at review time)
You don't really win, but sometimes you lose spectacularly.
Posted 20 October, 2022.
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3 people found this review helpful
2 people found this review funny
27.2 hrs on record (9.1 hrs at review time)
I don't know where I am but someone plays metal if I make things bleed
Posted 24 September, 2022.
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1 person found this review helpful
9.5 hrs on record
Played through the ME Legendary Edition and then I picked this up when it was on sale for $7.50. I already played it back around the time it was released, and after experiencing the original trilogy I was still jonesing for more. That was a mistake. ESPECIALLY coming directly from the original trilogy. This game is absolutely heartbreaking and I literally feel saddened when I think of the incredibly talented people that poured their lives into this for years only to see this lump of clay explode in the kiln.

In its defense, it easily has the best feeling combat of the ME games. However, everything else (and I truly do mean everything else) is either horrendous or just half-baked enough so that you can see the potential that was wasted. Worst of all though is the characters, which stands in stark contrast to the stellar and iconic characters of the original trilogy and the largest reason for why that series made enough money to allow this travesty to have a ride on its coat tails.

I want to make this abundantly clear: these characters are not just bad comparatively. They are some of the worst I've ever seen. No one is memorable, and if they are its because they're annoying. The only character I remember by name is Peebee, which is likely the closest they got to an interesting character. Everyone else is flat, vapid, and boring.

To cap things off, you barely even qualify as the main character, as most of the time you're just doing what you're told and looking like an awkward idiot while you fumble through it while other wooden characters do the things. The entire Andromeda Initiative is so poorly planned and loosely maintained that it strains credulity as a premise for this game. The people are so lacking in discipline and ability that it would have made better sense to depict them as exiles or accidentally in Andromeda because of the Reapers or something. As it is, it seems they would have completely starved and died off without the great Protagonist to save them. It's pathetic.

You want fun combat? If you can muscle through hours of slow and tedious gameplay that amounts to interactive cutscenes, you can then find some pretty great combat in here. I'd recommend looking elsewhere though. It's a great looking game, but I think a good analogy would be slapping a Lamborghini's body around a Pinto. All you're gonna think about is what it SHOULD be.
Posted 15 August, 2022.
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39 people found this review helpful
11 people found this review funny
9.5 hrs on record (8.9 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
It's Surviving Mars except it's Cities Skylines except it's Factorio except it's none of them.

I really think there's an interesting game in here somewhere, but everything about it just makes me want to play one of the other games. I can't recommend it, but I can't really not recommend it either. If you're into this stuff, and you're sick of all those other games, then this is also one of those games. But it might not be a bad idea to just wait a bit.
Posted 9 June, 2022.
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135 people found this review helpful
245 people found this review funny
3
8
2
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2
8
8.5 hrs on record (4.1 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
Remember when your dad yelled at you because you left the door open too long in the winter and he said he didn't want to have the heater on for the whole planet? Now you can put the heater on for the whole planet and your dad won't yell at you. 10/10
Posted 6 June, 2022.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
1,334.5 hrs on record (637.4 hrs at review time)
I still can't find mom
Posted 16 May, 2022.
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1 person found this review helpful
3.7 hrs on record (1.2 hrs at review time)
From the Ashes of Depravity Rises the Phoenix of Quality

How else to describe The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe?

Such a revolutionary step forward in the lineage of one of the most beloved video game properties of all time! The additions and changes made to this expansion will surely resonate in the annals of the history of all media ever made. It is perhaps true to say that no mistakes are forever etched in stone, for the stone into which The Stanley Parable was carved has itself been transmuted, offering a message of hope to those who have ever erred in their judgement. You are not beyond redemption. You may change, and you may become more, so much more than you were before.

If there is any message to be taken from The Stanley Parable: Ultra Deluxe, it is this...

What a fortune, a privilege, a joy it is to have had such an experience. It leaves me hopeful that as a community--as a world--there is time for us to become our greatest selves. As great as we ever could dream of in our wildest, most ambitious visions for a brighter future.
Posted 3 May, 2022.
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2 people found this review helpful
587.7 hrs on record (338.0 hrs at review time)
Almost done designing my character.
Posted 17 April, 2022.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
16.9 hrs on record (14.5 hrs at review time)
Yup. Get it.
Posted 30 March, 2022.
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No one has rated this review as helpful yet
1 person found this review funny
56.5 hrs on record (10.7 hrs at review time)
I'm saying yes, but my computer is definitely saying no.
Posted 22 November, 2021.
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Showing 21-30 of 83 entries