I was a cigarette for a costume party over the weekend. When I asked myself why I was dressed up looking like a six foot Marlboro light, I told myself it was a special occasion. But two days later, about to buy groceries, I had the urge to put on the costume, and I just wasn't strong enough to fight it.

Now, I'm in the costume almost as much as not, and people are starting to notice there's a guy in a cigarette costume walking around town, and they're asking questions. It's jeopardizing my job.

Yesterday I was at the mall, and my wife saw me in the costume for the first time. I was so ashamed; I turned around and ran as fast as I could yelling "TASTE LIKE NO OTHER" until I got outside. I don't think she recognized me; when she got home, she went straight to bed and hasn't mentioned it to me today.

Anyway, I need to stop but can't. What should I do?

I'll add to the list of things I'll never see, along with Obama's birth certificate

snow mexican

You know what I don't understand? No one ever takes memes seriously. I'm being honest here. No one ever stops and really understands the memes. They just pass it off as just another ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ that was made by some edgy ♥♥♥♥ in his basement, waiting for his mom to bring him chicken tendies. These people are wrong. Memes are made by the greatest minds on the planet. Each one is carefully and delicately crafted to get the most amount of karma on Reddit. I'm led to believe that maybe even Albert Einstein made a meme. Now, I am not talking about the ♥♥♥♥♥♥ Facebook memes that don't take any effort at all, like what you see on say, for example, Berny Snaders' page. They lack a soul. I only speak of 4Chan memes and the like. Things like dank pepe, dat boi (o ♥♥♥♥ waddup) and troll faces. These types of memes deserve respect. They aren't trash. They are art.

Dude, you're Nucking Futs man...

WTF?