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"Why are you laughing?" I continued. "Eat the paper. Eat it or I swear to god I'll buy your newspaper and turn it into an anime fanzine. If you don't start munching on that sport section right now, you'll be writing articles about Naruto till you're cold in the grave. I'm a billionaire, you think anyone will stop me?"
It took him 42 minutes to eat that paper. For 42 minutes I had total power over that man. I'd never felt more alive. I bet that's what being president feels like.