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／￣ ＼
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＼ ＿ ノ\
　＼　 ノ\
　　＼　ノ \
　　　＼ ノ \
　　　　＼ノ／￣＼
　　　／￣＼ ＼＿/
　　　＼＿／

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Don't trust this man. Not only has he received 283 CS:GO bans during his career, not including the numerous VAC bans and other offenses across several smurf accounts. He also tops the Forbes 100 list for up and coming terrorists in his area.

Hide your kids and hide your wife.

It was announced today by the Los Angeles Fire Department and Arson Squad that a string of recent fires have all been connected to what seems to be, a serial arsonist.

The suspected arsonist is purposely leaving his signature of evidence, which consist of gasoline cans, gasoline soaked rags, lighters, and what seems to be "the big sperm" or semen covering the scorched cans.

All fire departments are now on alert for the possibility of more fire started by the perpetrator. Now named "The Semen Arsonist".

This is Martin Wannamaker reporting live for channel 3 action news.

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