ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=┌(;￣◇￣)┘♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪Is there a character ☠️that could even possibly EVEN TOUCH Madara Uchiha? 😈Let alone defeat him.😈 And I’m not talking about Edo Tensei🌨 Uchiha Madara. 👺I’m not talking about Gedou Rinne 🐛Tensei Uchiha Madara either. 👹Hell, I’m not even talking about Juubi Jinchuuriki 🕷Gedou Rinne Tensei 🦀Uchiha Madara with the Eternal Mangekyou Sharingan 🦆and Rinnegan 🐗doujutsus 🤝(with the rikodou abilities and being capable of both Amateratsu 🦁and Tsukuyomi 🦊genjutsu), equipped with his Gunbai⛑💼, a perfect Susano’o, 🌚control of the juubi and Gedou Mazou💦💦, with Hashirama Senju’s DNA 🌮implanted in him so he has mokuton kekkei genkai👘 and can perform yin yang release ninjutsu👙👑 while being an expert in kenjutsu and taijutsu. 😽😺😻😽👏☠️👏👹🤜☠️🙏🏻😸☠️🙀👍🏿♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪♪(*^^)o∀*∀o(^^*)♪ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=┌(;￣◇￣)┘

Lil Pump is a child prodigy. At a mere three years of age, he was able to fully master the English language. When he turned five, he enrolled at Hamburger State University. There, he earned his bachelors degree in Lyrical Composition with a concentration in mumble rap. By six, he had mastered calculus and started writing PhD level academic papers.

While he struggled a bit with integral calculus, he figured it out through dedication and hardwork over almost twenty-three minutes. In one of his papers, he addresses a mathematical application of music that transcends human logic, acting as the spark for his music career. But before he could start on his journey to musical stardom, he resolved to finish his PhD. By eight, his intellectual capacity had exceeded that of an average twenty-eight and a half year old. Realizing his prodigious growth, Lil Pump thought he should spend some time in self reflection to get a better grasp on what he could expect of himself in future. So, he went to the Himalayas for 7 years to find himself. There, he interacted with thirty-five yetis and managed to convince the Hindu god, Shiva to add him on Snapchat.

After returning, Lil Pump kept his accomplishments secret, so people won't make a big deal out of them. He's always been the modest type. Finally, he started his music career. Having attained the status of a superhuman entity, nothing he has recently said seems to be comprehensible.

No, no he did not drop out of Harvard. But that's irrelevant.

Continuing with his story: His recent hit, “Gucci Gang”, is a work of art that scholars at top institutions around the world have failed to decipher. Lines from that lyrical masterpiece such as: “Gucci Gang Gucci gang Gucci gang Gucci gang Gucci gang Gucci gang Gucci gang” and “mah bih luh do cocaine” have felt academicians puzzled as to their true meaning, with seventeen Harvard professor having committed suicide after realizing their relative inferiority as compared to the god-man himself.

And such goes the tragedy of Lilliam Pumpernickel.

Now before any of you report me for ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hear me out. First according to the height of a Minion (which is 3.5 feet on average) Gru is 4 minions tall, which means he is a godly size of 14 feet tall. Furthermore if any of you remember the original Despicable Me, you know there is a scene when Vector kidnaps the three girls and shoots a series of heat-seeking misses at Gru, he then dodges them all. According to the speed of an average ballistic missile (1900 mph) and the size of the missile according to his ankle size, Gru can perceive and move at such a speed that the missiles only move 9.5 miles per hour, 0.5% of their original speed. After this Gru punches a shark and it is paralyzed meaning its spine is probably shattered, to remind you it would require a force greater than 3,000 newtons to fracture the spine.

That’s equal to the impact created by a 500-pound car crashing into a wall at 30 miles per hour. I rest my case.