Salvation (laotian)'s POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2017 @ 1:25pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 6:50pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 6:18pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 27 Oct, 2017 @ 12:04pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 6:22pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 7:11pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 8:04pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 27 Oct, 2017 @ 12:01pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 3 Nov, 2017 @ 5:48pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 9:25pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 2:03pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:17pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 27 Oct, 2017 @ 12:01pm

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 10:29am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 9:24pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 3 Nov, 2017 @ 5:51pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 10 Nov, 2017 @ 2:15pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 10 Nov, 2017 @ 2:20pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 3:35pm

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2017 @ 3:29pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 8:58pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 9:32pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 4 Nov, 2017 @ 7:00pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 10:19am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:31pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 3:12pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 10 Nov, 2017 @ 2:08pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:50pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 16 Nov, 2017 @ 5:32pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 5:34pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:31pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 6:18pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 3 Nov, 2017 @ 5:44pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 4:17pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 16 Nov, 2017 @ 5:35pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 11:57am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:37pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 18 Oct, 2017 @ 1:43pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 7:13pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 8:07pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 4:09pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 3:15pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 4:00pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 21 Oct, 2017 @ 7:16pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2017 @ 3:55pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 10:22am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 3:49pm

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 26 Oct, 2017 @ 3:59pm

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 9:59am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 9:53am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 3 Nov, 2017 @ 5:53pm

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 5:16pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 6:18pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2017 @ 3:41pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

25 / 30

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

20 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

19 / 30