Hello there internet,

my friend Bayren, (link in the description) loves updating his profile with tidbits of his life so as inspiring as this is (very) I shall attempt to do something similar in the biggest ripoff since KMT by Drake. Long Live XXXTENTACION.

Chapter 1- In this chapter I'll be discussing some of my biggest achievements in my existence. Grab a snack this could be lengthy. I'd say my first big W in life was grabbing an away goal at the hostile Nelson school back in year 6. Cracked one in off the crossbar to level the score and proceeding to high five members of the bench while screaming gibberish in a rather high pitched voice. I've never lost this prowess for producing pure brilliance under pressure. Another example of this can be cited while on holiday in Ibiza where I not only managed to film the reaction to Daniel Sturridges match winner against Wales but also shook the camera around so much that the video footage became almost motion sickness inducing as well as almost completely and utterly inaudible except for he constant presence of my own cringeworthy fanfare.

Despite all this actual real life nonsense the real big win of my life is achieving MLG greatness on a multitude of games. Firstly CS:GO, i'll sum it up in quotes as nor you or I have enough time to wade through the personal accolades i've been awarded throughout my time as a Gold Nova 1 (Occasional silver when my friends decide to suck(not me I swear)).


'a god given aimbot' - Seananners

'Don't do it Undertaker' - Jim Ross

'Buy nades please' - Un-named fan

'UN-BE-LIEVABLE'- Gary Neville

That will be all for now little disciples. I shall see you in the next installment for my biggest L's taken featuring special guests and a PS4 Giveaway. Until then don't forget to Like, Subcrode and have a Happy New Year.