soulslaw
carl   Bindura, Mashonaland Central, Zimbabwe
 
 
YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND ME. I AM AN ENIGMA BEYOND YOUR WILDEST IMAGINATION. GRASP MY HAND AS WE PLUNGE DEEPER INTO THE EVER DECAYING STATE OF THE HUMAN PSYCHE. A WORLD WITHOUT SUFFERING IS A WORLD WITHOUT PLEASURE. A WORLD WITHOUT WRONG IS A WORLD WITHOUT RIGHT. IT IS QUITE THE PITY THAT YOU WONT BE ABLE TO ENJOY IT NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU MAY THINK YOU ARE TRYING. THE TRUTH IS THAT THERE NEVER WAS ANYTHING HERE. AND THERE NEVER WILL BE. THE COSMIC DISPOSITION OF REALITY IS TOO GREAT FOR US TO BE ANYTHING MORE THAN AN ATOM ON THE ENDLESS TRUNK OF AN INFINITE ELEPHANT. SO PLEASE, PROCEED TO GRASP AND HOLD ONTO YOUR PERCEPTION OF WHAT IS REAL AND WHAT IS NOT. I WILL BE HERE, WAITING FOR YOU TO PLAY GAMES WITH ME.
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♥♥♥♥ & Maggot Cake Recipe
I know what you're thinking..



No. This isn't actually a cake made from human ♥♥♥♥ and live maggots. It's just a fun little name I thought of for my own cake recipe despite it being rather off putting.


I would not condone eating poop and maggots. It's just some light hearted fun to have in this world, because honestly it's pretty bland these days.


So I hope this brightens up your day!


Let's get into what you'll be needing to make this cake.


Ingredients



What makes this recipe so great is that it only needs just a few ingredients! No breaking the bank today!

You'll need:

10 cups of maggots (alive)

4 cups of ♥♥♥♥ (human)

Cinnamon to taste

Now that we have assembled our ingredients, we can begin the creation of our beautiful dessert.

Prep



Begin by dumping your maggots right onto your counter top. It's alright if a few wriggle off. Certainly some will. You may ignore them but try not to let too many of them escape.
Begin walling the maggots with an instrument of choice ( I recommend a spatula without any slits or holes ) and start padding them into a stout cylinder. You can adjust the shape to your liking depending on how you want the pieces to be cut when it's completed.

After gaining roughly the shape you want for your maggots, start to wall them off starting with the bottoms, using the ♥♥♥♥ and the spatula. Work your way upwards until the sides are completely covered.

Be sure to make the walls of poop decently thick as the maggots will immediately start burrowing into it. Remember to work quickly for the rest of this process.

With your walls covered, this is where you can add your cinnamon if that is to your liking. Try not to add too much or it might dissolve the maggots a bit, and the whole thing will be ruined.

After you've applied your desired amount of cinnamon, close off the top of the maggot pile with a layer of ♥♥♥♥.

Now it should resemble a chocolate cake somewhat, but good lord do we know it isn't.

One of the best parts about this recipe is that it's completely bakeless! We're almost done now!

Final Touches



Preheat your oven to 50 degrees, and put your disgusting ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ maggot poop pile into the oven and leave it there with the oven on for 1,250 minutes.

After it's done take it out and check that it's solidified into a brittle rock-like state on the exterior.

Hoo-ray!


You have ruined your oven. And nobody will come visit you because your house smells like a rotting corpse forever.

Seriously.
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Comments
The Goddess 16 Mar @ 1:43pm 
What's your profile pic from?
soulslaw 2 Mar @ 8:20am 
I am a very determined person.
oni 2 Mar @ 7:20am 
what the ♥♥♥♥ compels a man to 100% Ballsack Wonderworld? i cannot comprehend such lunacy
soulslaw 5 Feb @ 12:36pm 
Happy new year!
вирт астана 2 Jan @ 7:23am 
наркоман ♥♥♥♥
dickvore 19 Oct, 2024 @ 10:47pm 
i dont care fᴀɢɢᴏᴛ