I thought maybe i figured something out to be happy in life or what's out there for but lies ahead, Loving is all lies again and again.. I got nothing left to be happy but to die alone..


All the things i done, I push it all to far feeling deeper to darkness, I didn't know how to love.. I'm beyond hopeless in life tearing apart everything i see.. looking for opportunities relationship and i fail many times hoping i was royal to them, It's all gone gif thrown away as a trash to them.. done with me and find someone else mind because of my action..

I kept going willing to prove myself.. I wanted to yet.. Something keeps following me behind like a shadow watching over you and i failed multiple times in relationship.. I thought i feel love just to be with one person someone special.. I thought i did and i regret it all ever since, I hurt people instead of showing love i liked, How could i here.. What was doing.. Why am i here just to ruin everything that has something to do with love, Why did i have to ruin my own special relationship, I thought i could be happy...

I gone though this so much, I did what i have to do stopped looking for anyone.. I don't want to hurt them either but it's not fair that i have to be the loner, What even was my purpose, How did i get born to be liked this whatever was inside me had me do all of this, What's this shadow hovering over me just watching and waiting on something just to ruin more life even i ruin myself completely..

I couldn't stop hurting other right to the heart, My heart is always broken being hurt more going person after person hope to finally stop my suffering.. I kept making it worse making others have a reason to hate me looking for someone else they rather be with in their mind, I try to apologize yet they refuse, So it's my fault then?

I do whatever i could avoid.. No more love just.. Find something different but it still hurts knowing I'm the loner without the pack, So, I do know one thing love hurts when i think about it, It doesn't last long.. Not like fairly tale story, This is reality i can't get away,

I done so much.. I just couldn't find answers how it all starts, I'm just the void willing to tear anyone away, Love was a lie?

I wished to be happy for once, It won't end, My heart remains broken reminded what i done.. Love isn't important in life.. but i wish i didn't have to lose someone i loved dearly, I'm sorry for people there, I don't ask forgiveness..

I got nothing to hide but truth... 💔