Zoroark's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 8 Jul, 2019 @ 10:36pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 2:34pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 3:47pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 12:28pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2019 @ 1:43pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 1:19pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 3:43pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 6:32pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 12 Jul, 2019 @ 9:54am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 8:19am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 1:55pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 24 Sep, 2022 @ 7:45pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 9:19am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 10:53am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2021 @ 10:21pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2021 @ 9:11pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 27 Sep, 2022 @ 6:49pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 10:39am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 4 Oct, 2022 @ 9:47pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 4 Oct, 2022 @ 1:29pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 10:08am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 11:22am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 2 Oct, 2022 @ 10:44pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 12 Jul, 2019 @ 9:11am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2021 @ 8:39pm

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

Unlocked 3 Oct, 2022 @ 1:12pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 4 Oct, 2022 @ 1:41pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 11:34am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 4:39pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 10:50am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 5:28pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 9 Jul, 2019 @ 10:05pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 5:50pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 8 Jul, 2019 @ 9:37pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 2:15pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 6:34pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 2 Oct, 2022 @ 10:41pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 8:40am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 29 Dec, 2021 @ 6:15am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 1:58pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 4:10pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2021 @ 10:45am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2021 @ 9:15pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2021 @ 1:57pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2021 @ 9:27pm

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 4:56pm

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 24 Nov, 2021 @ 4:29pm

Ode to Eddings

Deactivated all of the Vend-A-Cure XJ-2 units.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2021 @ 10:10am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked 25 Nov, 2021 @ 8:50pm

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

Unlocked 23 Nov, 2021 @ 10:18pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 22 Sep, 2022 @ 7:51pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 10 Jul, 2019 @ 12:13pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

8 / 30

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

0 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

6 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

20 / 30