Started the game with the Vaegirs. Got pretty good at fighting, conquered half of the Nord castles for them. Got pretty respected throughout the whole world, my honor rating was delicious. But no matter what I did, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Vaegir King refused to recognize my swagger. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ old fart was probably jealous of my young vigor and strength while his soon-to-be corpse rotted away in his ♥♥♥♥♥♥ castle. I kept conquering, he kept not giving me any castles or even puny fiefs. At one point I was like: " Nah fam, this ♥♥♥♥♥ right here is probably writing the documents necessary to indict one such as myself for treason smh". So the next castle I conquered and he didn't grant me I kept for myself; started a new kingdom called "FukVaegKingSukD1k"; Conquered the whole world, except for the Vaeg lands. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ king saw who I was, almost pissed himself in fear (he probably had some bladder problems because of his old age but that's not important). Talked to him, he still didn't respect me and treated me like ♥♥♥♥ so I was like: "Nah fam, ain't giving you any more chances". Started courting his ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ daughter, she was all like "Oh love, I wish my dad wasn't a total ♥♥♥♥". ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ deflowered her on her father's bed. Proceeded to ♥♥♥♥ his ♥♥♥♥ up. Raided and pillaged his villages; stole his cattle; massacred his caravans; conquered his castles. The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ was holed up at a major town, can't remember which one, matters not. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ laid siege to it. Didn't attack but I waited for 100 days until they ran out of food. Puny bastard came out and surrendered. I, as a true gentleman, proceeded to cut his genitalia and roast it in fine wine while he bled by my side. He ate it as if it were a fine piece of phaesant, because he was hungry af. Didn't end his suffering. Bastard is resilient even without his man nuts. Made him my court fool. He sings and dances. Who knew that not having genitals would boost his singing voice and make him so agile. I am now the King, the only King.