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Ho 🎅ho 🎅ho 🎅ha 😂ha 😂, ho 🎅ho 🎅ho 🎅he 😂ha 😂. Hello 👋there, old chum 😴. I’m gnot an elf 🤳. I’m gnot a goblin 👺. I’m a gnome 🙌. And you’ve 👉😟been, GNOMED’ 😂🔥👌💯⁭

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Number 15

4 November, 2019 - Gav | 0 Comments

Burger King Foot Lettuce. The last thing you’d want in your Burger King Burger is someone’s foot fungus. But as it turns out that might be what you get. A 4chaner uploaded a photo anonymously to the site showcasing his feet in a plastic bin of lettuce. With the statement “This is the lettuce you eat at Burger King.” Admittedly he had shoes on, but that’s even worse. The post went live at 11:38 pm on July 16 and a mere 20 minutes later the burger king in question was alerted to the rogue employee, at least I hope he’s rogue. How did it happen? Well, the BK employee hadn’t removed the exif data from the uploaded photo, which suggested the culprit was somewhere in Mayfield Heights, Ohio. This was at 11:47. 3 minutes later, at 11:50, the Burger King address was posted, with wishes of happy unemployment. 5 minutes later, the news station was contacted by another 4channer. And 3 minutes later, at 11:58, a link was posted. BK’s “Tell Us About Us” online form. The foot photo, otherwise known as Exhibit A, was attached. Cleveland Scene Magazine contacted the BK in question the next day. When questioned, the breakfast shift manager said, “Oh, I know who that is. He’s getting fired.” Mystery, solved, by4 chan, now we can all go back to eating our fast food in peace.

⚠ BRUH ALERT ⚠

31 July, 2019 - Gav | 0 Comments

⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠...

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Ḇ̶̧̜̤̱̦͈͉̎̍͋͋͋r̶̥̹͚͕͚̠̖̣͚̀͋͆͒̾̂̊̊͐̀͘u̵̟̪͍̤̯̻̞̝͓͍̱͔͂̃̅̄̿̾̌͐̎̽̀̽̂̕ǔ̷̗̯͎̲̭̫͙͛͆̐͛͑̿̈́̂̚̚ͅu̴̼̼͍̻̲͇̬̾̐͌̀͌͒̀͒͆̈́͊̇ṵ̴̬̮̤̼̪̳̺͕̜̲̦̖̋̿̄̈̿͐̈́͠ư̶͕͈̻͚͖͙͕̫̜̑̃̇̋̽͘͜͝ų̸̺̘̈́̐͛ͅų̸̻͈̜͓̫͎̫͙̖̟̦̌̃̈͊̊̒̅ͅṵ̴͉͚͔͕͕̙̭͚̠̮̄̂̈͂̂́͌͘u̴̡̥̥̮͔͕̤̙͔̹͐͗͊̀̒ṵ̶̭̱͖͓̠͙͗̀̍̈́̍͜ų̷̠̮͓͈͔͍̯͔̖̳̘̿́͌̌̕ư̴̢̯͓̠̲̤͙̝͚̬̤͓͒̈̑͐̌̋͒͛͒̐̒̕͠ͅȗ̶̢̝͍̤̭̳̫̗̰͛̉̄̾͂̾̇̅ͅͅù̶̡̪̘͚͇̗̥̘͇͚̱̖̊̉̾ū̶͉͖u̸̢̢̺̰̝̻̱͇͉̘̾̈́̈́̑̈̒͘ͅu̷̢̡͔͉̞͊͐ư̸̮̩̞͙̪̝̮̻̤̤͋̎̽͋̍̎̏͋̅̐͆̈́̄u̵̢̧͇̞͓͎̻̺̫͙̘͎̞̗͊̕ư̵̠͝ȕ̸̧̬̼̱̱̩͔̣̝͔̟̜̞͇̕ư̵̘̩͇̠̻͙͖̗̳̜̿̈́̔̒̓h̷͍͓̪͇̹̭̆͂͑̀̅̄̂̂̾͊̓͊̓͝h̷̡̛̛̛̙͉̿͗̀̃͋͑̐͋͑̒͜͠ͅḩ̴̩̊͆̿̋̅̿̓̑͂̋̄͒̇͜h̸̢̫͕̦̖̉͛̌̄̓̽̕h̸̲͎̩̋̏̃̉̈́͛͝ḣ̸̢̡͔̘̮̳̯̯̅̐͐̕͠h̴͖̰͎̣̱̝̞̟̙̯̱͖͓̭̅̆͐̒͝͝ḩ̴̫̭̮̦̺̩͉̉ͅ

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The 👮 Department of 🏠 Homeland 🗽 Security 🚔 has issued a 🅱ruh Moment ⚠ warning 🚧 for the following districts: Ligma, Sugma, 🅱ofa, and Sugondese.

Numerous instances of 🅱ruh moments 🅱eing triggered by 👀 cringe😬 normies 🚽 have ⏰ recently 🕑 occurred across the 🌎 continental 🇺🇸United States🇺🇸. These individuals are 🅱elieved to 🅱e highly 🔫 dangerous 🔪 and should 🚫 not ❌ 🅱e approached. Citizens are instructed to remain inside and 🔒lock their 🚪doors.

Under ❌no⛔ circumstances should any citizen 🙊 say "bruh" in reaction to an action performed 🅱y a cringe😬 normie🚽 and should store the following items in a secure🔒 location: Jahcoins💶, V-bucks💴, Gekyume's foreskin🍆, poop💩 socks, juul💭 pods, ball 🍒 crushers, and dip.

Remain tuned for further instructions.

⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠...⚠BRUH⚠...

3 Comments

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Gav

7 Jul, 2019 @ 9:57am

EU SOU DE CURITIBA A SIBÉRIA BRASILEIRA, QUANDO FAZ FRIO MEU CU FICA TÃO CONTRAÍDO QUE EU USO PRA CORTAR SALAME, MAS ISSO NUNCA ACONTECE PORQUE FRIO DE VERDADE SÓ QUANDO TÁ ABAIXO DE -300, TEMPERATURA EM QUE AS BOLAS DO PAULISTANO RECOLHEM-SE PARA DENTRO DO CORPO TAL QUAL DUAS CATITAS EXPOSTAS À GLORIOSA LUZ MATINAL DA ALVORADA SULISTA, CUJA LUZ É EMITIDA PELO COLETIVO DE CABELEIRAS DE NOSSAS GOSTOSAS LOIRAS TEUTÔNICAS VERDADEIRAMENTE EUROPEIAS, COISA QUE NÃO EXISTE EM NENHUM OUTRO LUGAR DO BRAZIL (BRASILIEN EM INGLÊS) QUEM DIRÁ NO ANTRO DE CARCAMANOS QUE É A ATUAL PROVÍNCIA DE SÃO VICENTE, O NORDESTE DO SUL, SUDESTE E CENTRO-OESTE DO BRASIL.

Gav

1 Jul, 2019 @ 6:11pm

I've come to make an announcement:

Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, he took his hedgehog fucking quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife and he said his dick was "this big" and I said "that's disgusting".

So I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick, its the size of this walnut except way smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right baby, all point, no quills, no pillows, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong.

He fucked my wife so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth. That's right this is what you get, MY SUPER LASER PISS. Except I'm not pissing on the Earth, I'm gonna go higher, I'M PISSING ON THE MOON. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT OBAMA, I PISSED ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT!

You have twenty-three hours before the piss drop-el-ets hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my fucking sight, before I piss on you too.

rafitos 1 Jul, 2019 @ 6:11pm

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