Hello my satanic followers grab your necronmicon and take a seat on your freshly slaughtered lamb soul

Has your teacher ever said "time for S.S.R"? If so you like me probably came home that night thinking you were a terrible student. You continued to cry and hit your head so hard against the wall that the wall looked like a black stippers puuuun.Your depression turns into determination so you continue to go to your local town SatanicRitualsRUs, Your go there and ask the clerk "Can i have 1 young freshly raped and killed lamb,1 necronomicon, and a magic hood of satans fecees.The clerk says yes let me get that for you. He comes back with a satanic dank setup. He asks you if u want a membership for 20% off all specialy marksd "dank af" items. You say no then make your way home. You go to your room read your necronomicon. Then you make your pentagram and place the lamb in the middle. You then continue to summon the dark lord Cthulhu himself. He consumes your sould and tells you to do his bidding. That is why you are here welcome and remember stay satanic ;)