I am very smart. My mother tested me at a young age and said that my IQ was around 140, That's more than most of the human race has. So before you have a conversation with me, understand that my intelligence is so unbelievably great that most of you imbeciles would not be able to comprehend. It's quite sad really. I sometimes use old Latin words in my sentences so well that people don't even know what I said. Truly amazing. Do not even respond to this post unless you have an IQ over 120, because you would just be an utter waste of my valuable time that I could use contemplating life.

I want you to clean your vagina

Look at that subtle off-white coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God, it even has a watermark...

When I get to Paul Allen's place, I use the keys I took from his pocket. There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park and is obviously more expensive than mine

If a girl is six-feet-five inches tall, she's bound to have special problems

I'm into, uh, well, murders and executions, mostly