Best wishes dude, life can be a hell of a struggle, I hope you can push through and find the light at the end of the tunnel too like I did, it can feel impossible at times and is often especially unfair, but it's wonderful to finally break through and live a content and happy life, I think pretty much everyone deserves to be able to get through to that good state, but it can be a real difficult mission for some people getting there.

Best you can do is to keep pushing on and trying to better your situation and live and not to give up, even if it feels soul crushingly grim at times.
Hang in there buddy.

Dang knowing it took you a decade makes me feel like maybe I can beat it eventually

That would be a lil unrealistic, I'm already doing fantastic here and will be more than happy just to stay on a reliably consistent level to this 9/10 of the time.
The the only years of my life that I was on a remotely comparable consistency of happiness would be like 4-8 Years Old or something, and this is still better than that.

Also feel free to message me some time if you want, I'm usually happy to chat with people on my friends list on Discord and Steam.

Hope life continues to get better for you every year, homey