Okay so first off, in order to begin your journey to getting any woman to even consider being in the same room as you, you will need to peel yourself off of your gaming chair and actually shower. This is a very important step as an unclean man does not get b*tches.

Now that you've successfully showered, you need to apply deodorant to take care of that gamer stench. You're not gonna be able to pull if you have flies buzzing around you.

Alright, now we're making progress. Now this next step is by far the most challenging but you can do it if you really try. For this step you're gonna need to actually get out of your mother's basement and leave the house. Breathe some fresh air, touch some grass, and experience sunlight for the first time in god knows how long - you're over half way to getting b*tches now.

This one is easier said than done but I'm sure there's someplace desperate enough to employ you. Once you start making money the ladies will even start to acknowledge your existence!

Once you turn all that gamer fat into pure lean muscle, women will be all over you. Sure, you may develop crippling body dysmorphia and feel like no matter how much you lift, you'll never be good enough. But that's a small price to pay for getting women to like you.

Well done gamer! If you followed all 5 steps correctly you should now be able to get b*tches. Use this newfound ability to your advantage.