This guide is all about how you, too, can play Nine To Five [Open Beta] on your low-end PC.

Disclaimer: When I mean low-end PC, I am NOT saying "you low-end PC players that cannot afford to upgrade to an RTX 3090-powered, Corsair-motherboarded, Intel i-9900k with liquid ♥♥♥♥-cooled gaming rig" - not with my iMac from mid-2010 with a bootcamp Windows 8.1, anyway.

Step 1: Install the game.
Step 2: Realize that the game does not optimize its settings according to your system specs unless you manually get to the Settings menu and request it to, so expect a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of waiting and a perpetual 1-2 FPS stuttering screen until you get to do so.
Step 3: Lower everything as much as you can, AFTER the game throws you into an automatic tutorial without optimizing the game first [yes, I know it is in Open Beta].
Step 4: Get ♥♥♥♥♥♥ as you realize that you cannot subsample the resolution beyond what the game provides you, and after a while realize that the game keeps Temporal Supersampling on by default, leading to your occassional 30FPS zooming down to 5 like my time went in writing this guide.
Step 5: Join your first game.
Step 7: ALT+F4 from your first game.
Step 8: Realize I skipped Step 6 but I'm too lazy to go back and rewrite that.
Step 9: Uninstall and plan to write hate-filled review and then realize you are getting frustrated at a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ polygon generator.
Step 10: Wait for 1.0 release after realizing it is free-to-play, despite the upcoming microtransactions and [almost] definitely P2W DLC.
Step 11: Realize that the game works using a COD-based model of getting better gear the more you grind, and therefore will never be newbie-friendly once the Early Access period ends.

Step 12: Press Enter twice.
Step 13: Realize that the title of the guide has been made true, publish.

Smash Like and Subscribe? smash me pls