These are just a few pieces of poetry, created for a bit of amusement after playing the game "Ring of Elysium".

(If you liked some of these writings, then please rate this guide upwards.)

You have to run and get away
From the big blue freeze;
If you don't flee quickly,
You'll collapse down onto your knees.

I shot up an enemy
Who was driving a car.
He tried to escape,
But he didn't get far.



(Apologies to Elvis Presley and "In the ghetto".)

I am gliding, I am gliding,
In ROE, with some glee.
I am gliding windy currents;
From enemies, away I flee.

Never shoot me, never shoot me,
In the back, just for fun.
Don't you shoot me, it's not healthy,
As I'm gliding towards the sun.



(Apologies to Rod Stewart and "Sailing".)

Snowboarding down a mountain,
Zipping through the trees so fast,
Travelling at a speedy pace
In a snowy landscape vast

Slowing down when up a hillside,
But then launching from a crest;
When you’re at the highest speed,
Snowboarding is totally the best.

I once found a dinky little car,
And gleefully took it for a ride;
I drove across some rolling hills,
And then up a mountainside

When I had almost reached the top,
The vehicle tipped, and rolled quite far;
It was probably due to lousy driving
— But I think I’ll blame it on the car.

I played the game for ages,
Just looking for a thrill;
But, by the end of it all,
I'd only scored one kill.

This game will be ending shortly,
The rescue heli has now arrived;
And soon there’ll be a firefight
Between the players who have survived

Some will camp the heli’s ladder,
Ending lives with a bullet’s thud;
Then the winners will be flown away,
Covered in glory — and in blood.

We battled against the odds,
It was a hard-fought slog;
Then our survivors mounted up,
And disappeared into the fog.

My apologies to Madcondrew, who on 5 October 2018 (shortly after this guide was published), left a very nice comment ("This is legendary").

Unfortunately, as I was clicking between programmes on my PC, I had this page open on Steam, and accidentally clicked exactly on the "delete" symbol for his comment. Unfortunately, Steam has no check message (e.g. "Do you really want to delete this comment?"), and the comment was deleted. Nooooo!!!!! I was mortified.

Luckily, it was suggested that I check Archive.org, and there it was! The comment had been saved. So, I am now putting it here. And, again, I offer my apologies for accidentally deleting it. I wouldn't have minded if it was a trolling message, but it was such a nice and positive comment that I was saddened to see it go. Anyway, here it is...
https://web.archive.org/web/20181008180048/https://steamproxy.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1529298875

https://steamproxy.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1675474716

https://steamproxy.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2202977773

https://steamproxy.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1529929998

https://steamproxy.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=1725691175