"#402 +(1183)- [X]<zip`> sorry my mom just delivered taco bell

<Amanda_> I wish my mom was trained
#1344 +(913)- [X]<Brentai> Do you ever wonder if Japanese people all laugh at the zany translations they get of American games? "Did you know that in America, 'Super Flamey Skull Man' is named 'Scorpion'?" "Ha ha! Scorpion!"

<gaspump> "Can you believe they wouldn't even LIKE commuter train simulators in America!?!"
#3751 +(537)- [X]<djcrom> TOMORROW IS MY BIRTHDAY

<djcrom> I ACCEPT VISA, MASTERCARD, AND WEED.
#6483 +(376)- [X]<dj_ak> i just popped a zit on my shoulder

<dj_ak> and it hit me in the eye

<dj_ak> then i licked my eye

<splifs> women must love you
#6927 +(206)- [X]<MenTaLguY> You know, the trouble with cocaine is that the "...but I didn't inhale" excuse doesn't work
#7659 +(815)- [X]<xwred1> hmm... do you recommend I replace windows me?  I have lots of friends, I can wares lunix for free.  thats what hackers use, isn't it?

<TheOnyx> You want to warez linux?

<xwred1> you have to, I hear that unix stuff is expensive.  windows me came with my gateway, I tried to ask them for lunix but they told me not to get it because it was buggy and stuff
#8484 +(267)- [X]<Bobski> goconnect. the internet equivalent of the dole.

<jamesm> what is it?

<Bobski> a freebie internet service for those who blew their last 5 bucks on mcdonalds

<jamesm> how do they make money?

<Bobski> you install a wanky dialer and it spatters your screen with ads. mostly mcdonalds ads actually :)

<jamesm> in case you find another fiver
#8899 +(245)- [X]<Lazzay> PREPARE ALL ASSES FOR IMMEDIATE ENTRY
#8906 +(532)- [X]<vidividividi> kristen dumped me

<greggyhot> oh NO!

<vidividividi> i cant believe it

<vidividividi> i JUST bought her a 300 dollar necklace!!!

<vidividividi> at least i can count on all of you for support

*** vidividividi has been kicked by krassproduction (get the ♥♥♥♥ out of here, you cheap jerk)
#9438 +(502)- [X]<phiber> advice: dont call a girl ugly when you have your manhood in her mouth ;/
#11146 +(339)- [X]<spoob> drewb; it's been so long since I've had my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ that I'm not sure it can handle less than one atmosphere anymore
#11219 +(137)- [X]<Twitch> next halloween i should hand out SVCDs

<Twitch> i wonder if the cops would show up
#11587 +(847)- [X]<arenotelicon> and jason picked it up.  "hello?  *pause*  yeah, she's right here. *glances at me*  thirty-four C."  me:  "thirty-six."  jason:  "thirty-six c.  yeah.  bye."
#12203 +(161)- [X]*** Joins: Xelix ([email protected])

<Xelix> Greetings.

<Xelix> I am Dan, Jedi Knight.

<Xelix> I have come to discuss something with any of you.

<Xelix> I shall return at another time.

*** Parts: Xelix ([email protected])
#13549 +(275)- [X]<Sumez> so, what's happened over the last week?

<RafaMan>
#14190 +(572)- [X]<joey`> what was that url again langdon

<joey`> ircnews

<sharkbyte> http://www.ircnews.com/lamers.html

<joey`> langdon...tell people to stop answering questions for you

<sharkbyte> langdon says no problem

<joey`> good
#17217 +(742)- [X]<PuyoDead> gahaha, I'm watching some porn live cam, and the girl is just sitting there eating doughnuts
#20248 +(158)- [X]<notxyst> ♥♥♥♥ budget cuts

<notxyst> bush should make wrist cuts
#29960 +(565)- [X]<pork> all the chicks here are either really ugly, lesbian, or men

<CardCheat> some are all three, pork

<Shovelbearer> uglesbimen
#34160 +(281)- [X]<Elly_May> she works where the men come and pay money for sex...

<Elly_May> what do you call it again...

<DrNick668> hahahah

<qrg> hahahha

<DrNick668> thailand
#34318 +(847)- [X]<Gibs> I like chinese, they only come up to my knees...

<Bah> My boyfriend is half chinese and he is 6 ft 3

<Gibs> so he didnt get the shortness of the chinese

<Bah> yes he did.......
#36175 +(134)- [X]<Joesomebo> but can I operate under a different IP address that's not being used for example? Or is that the type of thing they only do in movies
#36570 +(14)- [X]<KaMiKrAe-Z> hahah you zoomed in on a babies nads
#37520 +(1369)- [X]<@Zen> So Sean's toaster has two settings:

<@Zen> toast

<@Zen> and bagel.

<@Zen> But it's not a switch/

<@Zen> It's a dial.

<@Zen> So I guess if your bread is 60% bagel

<@Zen> this toaster can handle it.
#38115 +(367)- [X]<CptPlanet> man. i just called my finger a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ for having a splinter in it.

<CptPlanet> i need to get some friends, stat.
#40004 +(214)- [X]<Mp3Boy-> I told him grep pulls out the ♥♥♥♥ u want

<Mp3Boy-> like cat girl | grep ♥♥♥♥♥

<Mp3Boy-> then he understood
#41417 +(277)- [X]<Dr_Greenthumb-> tomarrow I got the house to myself for 4 days

<Dr_Greenthumb-> ahhh, the orgies...

<@EnD-Raistlin> left and right hand at the same time ? :o
#44073 +(319)- [X]<Hurricane_Hasney> I'm just a pedophile really

<Hurricane_Hasney> I mean audiophile

<Hurricane_Hasney> Sheesh, talk about mis-type of the century :S
#45762 +(401)- [X]<SillyTweeker> yea, so i got  with this one girl last night.  dude, she was hot as hell. we went at it while we ate cheetos.

<uniboarder> same here man, i was alone last night, so i dressed up my hand with make-up and a little skirt and she jerked me off for 6 hours straight.

<SillyTweeker> ...

<Uniboarder> Oh don't get all high and mighty!
#45990 +(99)- [X]<KutDrop> there's not much worse than IRC porn spammers with bad English skills.

<KutDrop> I'm sick of claiming to the top of my orgasms.

<@Habeeb> hahahha

<@Habeeb> that is great KutDrop

<KutDrop> I don't want to claim them.  I want to HAVE them.

<KutDrop> :

<roto> can you buy them on ebay?

<KutDrop> I'm sure in some indirect way, yes.

<roto> cool
#50544 +(214)- [X]<slut> i'm banned from kmart for stealing condoms i'll never use
#55020 +(221)- [X]<Foxxz> OMG! you know our dorm is nerdy when someone finds a math tv show and we all start watching.
#57733 +(1)- [X]<Locke> that reminds me of my orange shirt thingy

<Locke> (its not actually orange mind you)

<Locke> its from their stupid campign for sms messages

<kailus> oh ok

<Locke> it says "r u ok?"

<Locke> and when you turn it inside out it says "i feel gr8!"

<Locke> and im just dying to write "OMG LOL!!!!" on it

<Locke> but the ink will wash off :/

<kailus> hehe awww :\
#60643 +(461)- [X]<Sarin_Died> I forgot to turn off the alarm on my alarm clock last night, so the radio turned on at 10:30am thismorning

<Sarin_Died> and I hear a car commercial saying "Attention, would the person with the late 1980's station wagon with fake wood panels please move your car, you are blocking 7 parking places" and I got up thinking DAMNIT I have to move my car
#60865 +(-95)- [X]<Bop|Kat> you know what they say about black guys!

<Mondo> yeah

<Mondo> they steal ♥♥♥♥

<Bop|Kat> shut up!

<Bop|Kat> my dads black!

<Mondo> im only screwin round :P

<Bop|Kat> I was only kiddin too

<Bop|Kat> My dad is white

<Bop|Kat> he's an arsehole tho

<Mondo> so he might as well be black ?
#76387 +(21)- [X]<Kuroko> lasagna --> waffles ---> pie ---> cake ---> death by chocolate ---> chocolate coffins ---> embalmed in chocolate ---> maggots and chocolate ---> sexy chocolate-covered corpses
#83746 +(400)- [X](@Hektik) once i saw my grandparents have sex and thats why i dont eat rasins
#91303 +(793)- [X]<mustafa12>Ya, in 9th grade I was reading some background history on a poem out loud to the class and the poem was written in 1337, me being the cool social butterfly that I am, I read it as "leet"
#99032 +(232)- [X]<|NightChade|> Chinese smorgasboard and bee"