Spooder
(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥   Antarctica
 
 
привет ! This is Russian tutorial to favorite game CS:GO. Please read tutorial on how get gud. This guide is for all CS:GO ranks, pros and beginners. If follow correctly, the people from other nations will bow to mother Russia. Let's begin:


1. Buy bad microphone.
This will ensure that your teammates understand "cyka blyat" and "drop avp blyat" properly.

2. Have ping >100 ms.
Otherwise game is too easy for skilled Russian player.

3. At start of every round check if you have bomb. Drop it. Real Russians play CS:GO for frags, not for
plants.

4. If capital (capitalist swine game) is over or equal 4750$, buy AVP! (You don't need armor, because you
hit every shot first try.)

5. If capital is lower than 4750$, say "drop AVP blyat". If nobody gives you AVP, proceed with No. 6.

6. If capital is between 1700$ and 4750$, buy SSG! (Again: You do not need armor, just get headshots.)

7. If capital is lower than 1700$, buy Deagle.

8. Never ever Eco. Ace with Deagle and armour!

9. If your non-russian teammate dares to plant bomb, don't camp or defend it. Just hunt the remaining
CT's.

10. If bombsite is clear, don't plant bomb or wait for your teammates, just go for more frags.

11. Never ever give info about your enemies. You need to stay top-fragger.

12. From time to time, you do not drop the bomb, but rush first with bomb. This is a change in tactics and
enemies won't be prepared.

13. If you are CT and bomb is planted, stick to your AVP and don't pick up noob-M4. AVP is very
effective close-combat.

14. You need more than 3 AVP's in your team to win round effectively.

15. Play with 3 other Russian friends. Just talk Russian.
(The 5th guy has to be random, so he can learn from you.)

16. Don't buy defuser. You need 400$ for AVP.

17. If you are CT, the bomb planted and you are on wrong bombsite, wait ~20 sec to rotate. The bomb
will wait for you to defuse it.

18. It is common misconception that people think Russians say "Rush B". "Rush B" implicates, that you
want to plant bomb as early as possible. You do not plant bomb.


This is basic knowledge on how to play CS like Russian alpha-male. I hope you liked it.
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116 hodin celkem
Naposledy hráno 10. zář. 2023
0,1 hodin celkem
Naposledy hráno 2. led. 2022
fr1zlyyy 17. říj. 2022 v 10.20 
noob
denkishh 13. úno. 2022 v 6.26 
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     (,`, З о,.ノ 川彡ゞ彡+rep fun to play cs with
@ 12. úno. 2022 v 13.56 
+rep
@ 5. úno. 2022 v 14.40 
Please respond, I am the mother of a 9 year old that you played Minesweeper with. After your [One "vs" One] match with him he came home with a sore back, not too long after that he got diagnosed with autism out of the sudden, my child has always been very loquacious and talktive, it all started changing after your match please tell me what happened in your private lobby, i tried joining the lobby but it asked for my credit card information for some reason so i didn't trust that, Please don't take offense in this but the internet is a wild place nowadays you can't trust anything anymore. more importantly tho, i await your reply, please contact me at "[email protected]" if you happen to read this.
⚡︎ aNTIII- 5. úno. 2022 v 14.06 
-rep wh but still sucks ♥♥♥♥
Mr Greys Sugar Daddy 5. úno. 2022 v 13.29 
-rep russian hacker, thx valve for the wasted hour