I am Clorthax, a time-traveling trickster! I know what you’re thinking: "A professional trickster? This sounds like a trick!" That is a reasonable concern! But what I am about to tell you is not a trick, and to prove it, I will type it in all caps: THIS IS NOT A TRICK.

Okay, it’s a trick. But only on the people of the future! You’re going to love this. Why? Because I have stolen the ten best games from the far future, then traveled across an ocean of time to sell them to you! Exclusively on Steam!

Anyway, I can’t outright tell you the names of these incredible games, or their exact location on Steam. This would create a timeline-destroying paradox that will make the future an unlivable hellscape.

Instead, I can give you vague hints about these games. This will still create paradoxes, of course — but smaller ones that’ll just make the future slightly crappier. And I’ll be rich and famous, so who cares.