lucilfer
 
 
“𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤. 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮... 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐬... 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐰... 𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡. 𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍ ‍𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘'𝐒 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 ‍
‍ ‍ ‍
In my restless dreams,
‍ ‍I see that town.
Silent Hill.
‍ ‍You promised you'd take me
‍ ‍there again someday.
‍ ‍But you never did.

‍ ‍Well I'm alone there now...
‍ ‍In our 'special place'...
‍ ‍Waiting for you.

‍ ‍Waiting for you to
‍ ‍come to see me.
‍ ‍But you never do.
‍ ‍And so I wait, wrapped in my
‍ ‍cocoon of pain and loneliness.
‍ ‍I know I've done a terrible
‍ ‍thing to you. Something you'll
‍ ‍never forgive me for.

‍ ‍I wish I could change
‍ ‍that, but I can't.
‍ ‍I feel so pathetic and ugly
‍ ‍laying here, waiting for you...
‍ ‍Every day I stare up at the cracks
‍ in the ceiling and all I can think
‍ ‍about is how unfair it all is...

‍ ‍The doctor came today.
‍ ‍he told me I could go
‍ ‍home for a short stay.
‍ ‍It's not that I'm getting better.
‍ ‍It's just that this may be
‍ ‍my last chance...

‍ ‍I think you know what I mean...

‍ ‍Even so, I'm glad to be coming
‍ ‍home. I've missed you terribly.
‍ ‍But I'm afraid James.
‍ ‍I'm afraid you don't really
‍ ‍want me to come home.
‍ ‍Whenever you come see me,
‍ ‍I can tell how hard it is on you...
‍ ‍
‍ ‍I don't know if you
‍ ‍hate me or pity me...
‍ ‍Or maybe I just disgust you...

‍ ‍I'm sorry about that.

‍ ‍When I first learned that
‍ ‍I was going to die, I just
‍ ‍didn't want to accept it.
‍ ‍I was so angry all the time and I
‍ ‍struck out at everyone I loved most.
‍ ‍Especially you, James.

‍ ‍That's why I understand
‍ ‍if you do hate me.

‍ ‍But I want you to
‍ ‍know this, James.

‍ ‍I'll always love you.

‍ ‍Even though our life together had
‍ ‍to end like this, I still wouldn't
‍ ‍trade it for the world. We had
‍ ‍some wonderful years together.

‍ ‍Well this letter had gone on
‍ ‍too long so I'll say goodbye.
‍ ‍I told the nurse to give
‍ ‍this to you after I'm gone.
‍ ‍That means that as you read
‍ ‍this, I'm already dead.

‍ ‍I can't tell you to remember me,
‍ ‍but I can't bear for you to
‍ ‍forget me.

‍ ‍These last few years since I
‍ ‍became ill...I'm so sorry for
‍ ‍what I did to you, did to us...
‍ ‍You've given me so much and
‍ ‍I haven't been able to return
‍ ‍a single thing.

‍ ‍That's why I want you to live for yourself now.
‍ ‍Do what's best for you, James.

‍ ‍James...

‍ ‍You made me happy.
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