El Mosias's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 10:57pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 4:54pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 26 Jan @ 3:11pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 11:34pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 3:46pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 7:52pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 10:53pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 8:20pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 11:10pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 1 Feb @ 4:03pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 2 Feb @ 10:28pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 8:48pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 8:44pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 14 Jun @ 7:05pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 15 Nov @ 9:55pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 11:36pm

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 1 Feb @ 4:02pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 2 Feb @ 5:20pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 11:10pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 10:06pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 8:54pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 8:53pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked 16 Jun @ 10:31pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 7:49pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 10 Jun @ 10:37pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 2 Feb @ 9:47pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 31 Jan @ 7:33pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 11:25pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 14 Jun @ 7:18pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 16 Jun @ 1:10pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 11:08pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 3:50pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 9:35pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 10:56pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 18 Mar, 2023 @ 11:38pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 9:51pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 10:22pm

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 15 Nov @ 6:26pm

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 27 Jan @ 10:40pm

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 1 Feb @ 3:48pm

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 15 Nov @ 6:16pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 10:18pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 9:14pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 8:59pm

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 2 Feb @ 10:30pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 10 Jun @ 6:02pm

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 10 Jun @ 10:51pm

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 14 Jun @ 8:03pm

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 16 Jun @ 1:07pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 17 Jun @ 12:10am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 13 Jun @ 11:49pm

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 14 Jun @ 8:02pm

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

Unlocked 10 Jun @ 8:59pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 12 Feb @ 8:14pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 5 Feb @ 10:42pm

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

27 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

13 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

6 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

19 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

7 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

3,305 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

19 / 30