r4yzo's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 7:52am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 7:35am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 5:37am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 3:22pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 8:11am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 2:26pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 8:13am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 4:11am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 12:44am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:24am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 10:36am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2017 @ 12:52am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 2:44pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 12:43am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 6:56am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 4:06am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:26am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:15am

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 9:59am

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 7:50am

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 3:18pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 4:14am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 7:49am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2017 @ 1:00am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 8:37am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 6:47am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 1:47am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 8:05am

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 9:42am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 9:57am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2017 @ 12:54am

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 3:59am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 5:37am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:21am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 7:58am

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2017 @ 12:23am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2017 @ 12:34am

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 10:06am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:01am

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 7:26am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 2:22pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 8:15am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 7:55am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 3 Jul, 2017 @ 7:58am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 22 Nov, 2017 @ 3:06pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 3:35am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 6:57am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 9:41am

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2017 @ 10:12am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 11:56am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 5:30am

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 8:35am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 6:44am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 14 Jul, 2017 @ 3:47am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2017 @ 2:46pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2017 @ 11:21am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 4 Jul, 2017 @ 3:44am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

3 / 30