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Portugal 
😘
A straw vote only shows which way the hot air blows.
-- O'Henry
🤣
Have you seen the latest Japanese camera? Apparently it is so fast it can
photograph an American with his mouth shut!
😷
Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant "idiot".
(The Colour of Magic)
🙂
If all else fails, lower your standards.
😫
He [Edward d'Eath] could think in italics. Such people needed watching.
Preferably from a safe distance.
(Men at Arms)
😲
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
🤤
"Now we've got a truth to die for!"
"No. Men should die for lies. But the truth is too precious
to die for."
(Small Gods)
😍
Anyone who has had a bull by the tail knows five or six more things
than someone who hasn't.
-- Mark Twain
😭