rawr

+rep winner winner chicken dinner (forgot to add rep long ago lol)

I ever tell you about the time my buddy Keith made sushi? Yeah, his mom took him to a sushi place for his birthday and he didn’t want to go, but he turned out he LOVED it, man. But it’s like 10 bucks a su-sho in one of them places, so Keith figures, "Hey, how hard can it be to roll up some raw food in seaweed,” right? As it turns out, it’s hard. Now, they say that experience is the best teacher, and experience taught Keith that if you ever eat three pounds of raw chicken, it kills you. Now luckily, Keith’s brain went into self-defense mode and started shutting organs down to head the chicken off at the pass, and the doctors were able to get ‘em out before his heart stopped. But to this day, Keith has no sensation in his right foot, and doesn’t recognize his own brother Paul no more.

+rep i hate this guy

very ebic