Like, what are you even saying? They didn’t tell anybody about it; they were just like, “SHH, WE DON’T TRUST YOU. YOU CAN LEAVE.” They didn’t tell any of her parents; they didn’t tell anybody who worked there. ARE YOU JOKING ME? OH MY GOD.

Like, what are you even saying? They didn’t tell anybody about it; they were just like, “SHH, WE DON’T TRUST YOU. YOU CAN LEAVE.” They didn’t tell any of her parents; they didn’t tell anybody who worked there. ARE YOU JOKING ME? OH MY GOD.

I’m sitting there like, “WHAT’S WRONG WITH CHINESE LESBIANS? ARE YOU JUST HOMOPHOBIC OR SOMETHING?” I LOVE CHINESE LESBIANS; no clue why you’re pressed. This is my SIGN: NEVER work somewhere that EXPLOITS YOU because THIS is what you’ll get. And at this point, I’m starting to believe the boss is the one SEARCHING UP CHINESE LESBIANS because they keep CHANGING THEIR STORY. One day it’s, “WE HAVEN’T USED THIS PHONE IN A LONG TIME,” or “THIS IS SOMEBODY ELSE’S PHONE.”

And so when I sent it to that group chat, I left my phone for FIVE HOURS okay? I don’t go back to my phone for five hours, and then after those five hours, I come back to like THIRTY MISSED CALLS. And then, like, my friend responded to the picture with, “OH, THIS IS THE BOSS’S SEARCH HISTORY,” she literally, like, gave my picture contact. And then his WIFE–we did not know his wife was in that group chat either. So his wife responded with an ADRENALINE-FUELED RANT like, “WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS, WHAT’S GOING ON?” And apparently, she was scared, thinking we were IMPLYING HER HUSBAND WAS CHEATING by watching lesbians on YouTube or whatever.

So, like, a bunch of months later I remember this. I’m like, “OH, REMEMBER THE TIME WE SAW THAT IN HIS SEARCH HISTORY?” And then I was like–and then she was like, “OH YEAH, I REMEMBER.” I’m like, “OH, I SAW THIS. I SAW LIKE THE PICTURES OF THE SEARCH HISTORY,” and she’s like, “OH, OKAY.” And then she was like, “CAN I SEE?” and I was like, “OKAY, YEAH, YOU CAN SEE.” So I sent it to her, and I thought I sent it to her, but I ACCIDENTALLY SENT IT TO THE WORK GROUP CHAT with HIS WIFE in it.

But an hour later I’m like, “I WANT TO LISTEN TO SOME CHAPPELL ROAN.” So I get the phone and “CH,” “CH” also happens to be the first two letters of CHINESE LESBIANS, and GUESS WHAT was in the search history? And then I completely forgot about this; like, he took a bunch of PICTURES of the search history, and then he sent everybody, he’s like, “HA, IT’S SO FUNNY.” I’m like, “OH, OKAY.”