Girls are like math, if they are under 10 you use your fingers...

Emotions are a secret jewish conspiracy to brainwash young people into believing in mental illnesses and thus making them weaker against an inevitable hebrew takeover

Microwaves be like: MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM BEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEP BEEEE-* click slide slam

I remember once when my dad gave me money to pay the electricity bill but instead I bought a lottery ticket for a brand new car. When I got home, I explained to my dad what I did and he beat the crap out of me. But the next day, when my dad woke up and opened the door, outside my house was a brand new car. We all cried especially me, because the car was from the electricity company, they were there to cut off the electricity, my dad beat the crap out of me again

Some days, I wish I was a girl. Not because of "emotions" or that "being stuck in the wrong gender" ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. I wanna be a girl because they got ♥♥♥♥♥♥ titties man. And there ain't nothin better than a pair of luxurious milky mountains. Feeling down? Give em a squeeze. Someone else feeling down? Let them have a squeeze. Man tittles just aren't the same. If I'm in the shower, poundin my ♥♥♥ fountain with one hand, I want some genu-ine mighty fine bonhonkeras in the other. But there's just one thing stopping me from achieving Nirvana. And that is that girls are ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ gay.

Incels: I have been standing for 24 hours in Starbucks opening the door to any female that crosses and none of them have sucked my ♥♥♥♥. The fact that a human can be so heartless is beyond me, but these are strange times we love in. The worst thing was when a 25 year old showed up and said thanks. I, thinking she forgot, asked “are you gonna say anything else?” And the audacity of this ♥♥♥♥♥ to say “no, what else would i say?” No? How about a love proposition you disgusting slut!