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The best audience is intelligent, well-educated and a little drunk.
-- Maurice Baring
Symptom: Everything has gone dark.
Fault: The Bar is closing.
Action Required: Panic.
Symptom: You awaken to find your bed hard, cold and wet.
You cannot see the bathroom light.
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Action Required: Check your watch to see if bars are open yet. If not,
treat yourself to a lie-in.
-- Bar Troubleshooting
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