"Why don't homeless people just go to pontins? We've solved the housing crisis!" - 30/06/2020

brick

♥♥♥♥

Just me and my 💕daddy💕, hanging out I got pretty hungry🍆 so I started to pout 😞 He asked if I was down ⬇for something yummy 😍🍆 and I asked what and he said he'd give me his 💦cummies!💦 Yeah! Yeah!💕💦 I drink them!💦 I slurp them!💦 I swallow them whole💦 😍 It makes 💘daddy💘 😊happy😊 so it's my only goal... 💕💦😫Harder daddy! Harder daddy! 😫💦💕 1 cummy💦, 2 cummy💦💦, 3 cummy💦💦💦, 4💦💦💦💦 I'm 💘daddy's💘 👑princess 👑but I'm also a ♥♥♥♥♥! 💟 He makes me feel squishy💗!He makes me feel good💜! 💘💘💘He makes me feel everything a little should!~ 💘💘💘 👑💦💘Wa-What!💘💦👑

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour three 9-inch pans. Sift together the flour, baking powder, and salt. Set aside.
In a large bowl, cream together the shortening and sugar until light and fluffy. Beat in the eggs one at a time, mixing until each egg is incorporated; stir in the vanilla. Beat in the flour mixture alternately with the milk. Finger me. Divide batter into 3 bowls.
In the first bowl, stir in lemon zest and yellow food coloring; pour into prepared pan. In the second bowl, stir in orange zest and orange food coloring; pour into second prepared pan. In the last bowl, stir in the lime zest and green food coloring; pour into third prepared pan.
Bake in the preheated oven until a toothpick inserted into the center of each cake layer comes out clean, about 30 minutes. Let cool in pan for 5 minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack and cool completely.

Heat oven to 220C/fan 200C/gas 7. Tip the flour into a large bowl with the salt and baking powder, then mix. Add the butter, then rub in with your fingers until the mix looks like fine crumbs. Stir in the sugar. Put the milk into a jug and heat in the microwave for about 30 secs until warm, but not hot. Add the vanilla and lemon juice, then set aside for a moment. Put a baking sheet in the oven. Make a well in the dry mix, then add the liquid and combine it quickly with a cutlery knife – it will seem pretty wet at first. Scatter some flour onto the work surface and tip the dough out. Dredge the dough and your hands with a little more flour, then fold the dough over 2-3 times until it’s a little smoother. Pat into a round about 4cm deep.