optimist, n:
A bagpiper with a beeper.
😍
GREAT MOMENTS IN HISTORY (#7): November 23, 1915

Pancake make-up is invented; most people continue to prefer syrup.
🤓
'There's stranger people in this world than Corporal Nobbs, my lad.'
Carrot's expression slid into a rictus of intrigued horror.
'Gosh.'
(Men at Arms)
😬
Coach: How's it going, Norm?
Norm: Daddy's rich and Momma's good lookin'.
-- Cheers, Truce or Consequences

Sam: What's up, Norm?
Norm: My nipples. It's freezing out there.
-- Cheers, Coach Returns to Action

Coach: What's the story, Norm?
Norm: Thirsty guy walks into a bar. You finish it.
-- Cheers, Endless Slumper
🤧
"Someday I'll write my own philosophy book." -Calvin
😚
...I would go so far as to suggest that, were it not for our ego and
concern to be different, the African apes would be included in our
family, the Hominidae.
- Richard Leakey
😫