Hey, uh, this is Phil from the small weiner club. Sorry to get back to you so late, I just finished reviewing your application and information you sent in, but I'm sorry to say that I don't think I'll be able to let you in the group, from what I'm looking at, you weiner is- massive. I mean, the sheer girth and juiciness alone is rediculous. It looks as if somebody glued a forearm to the bottom of your torso. You could probably stand on it like a tripod, and that's not even mentioning how fat your nuts are. But- it does appear as if you're going to have to take that ginormous ~schmeat~ somewhere else.

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