Recent reviews by Hekek

Things I learned from the game:
Wolves hunt in packs.
Rocks look interesting.
Rook has to be thrown into the closest body of water ASAP.
Pawns have the biggest brain plasticity ever in video games.
"The player did what? I will copy that in the next battle." - if you can't hit a phys damage immune enemies as a physical damage only class, the mage pawns will idle around.
If you ask for help, your pawn will become an obsessive, clingy GF/BF.
If you start looting before the fight is over, your pawn will not do battle in the next fight.

When you get dragged away by a hellhound for the first time it's certainly a ride followed by audibly asking "what the dog doing?" every time it happens again.

Hybrid vocations are all broken.
Normal vocations are mostly broken,
Advanced ones are also broken.


EDIT after Dark Arisen:
Epstein’s long lost sister welcomes you on her island after scouting you in Cassardis. However, you quickly realise that there are no midgets solving math equations and you are instead used as a punching bag. And let’s not forget about gambling after you manage to survive.

BBI is easily a game of its own. It makes Dragon’s Dogma shine in a new light. The dense environment help you see gameplay mechanics likely how they were intended to be (even Ricochet hunter). The farming and RNG can be a bit brutal, but you can also tinker with the loottables to some extent within the game. And there is a good in-game mechanic for altering chest loot. Once you got decent gear a BBI run becomes addictive because the great combat is made even better when you face hordes of strong enemies.

For any future 'gamer' curriculum Dragon's Dogma should be mandatory.
Clean 9/10

The game's message is 'eating children is le bad'.
Ladies and gentleman, gamers... I say, do not be afraid. Eat away.






Review:
The game isn't that recommendable - it's good for a single playthrough, but even that feels a bit lengthy at times, not to say boring. I would not recommend you to buy at a full price.

Art - it is eerie. Some imagery is taken straight from Auschwitz (room filled with shoes and suitcases). Other imagery I dare not do research on. It was enough to see the yellow raincoat sate their hunger.

Game - The controls are very unreliable, but it gets better once you get used to them. Walking will still be difficult in some rooms. Mechanics are also glitchy- walls and objects may not function as such and the enemy's hand just grabs you from a few inches farther away, ignoring walls and objects alike. Hanging from a door, may be interpreted as you gaining momentum and if you let go you are propelled into the abyss (doorway leading up to a broken hallway), at other times you just let go and fall on the ground. In short, the game is not very consistent, you might die to this fall, but not the other. At least the camera tracking isn't so bad.

I can't get over it. I cannot git gud. 03+01 I can(not) advance. 03.1+1.1 I can(not refund).
Even if you play other 'hard' games there's just some that don't work for you.
Adding "Mario" style damage to an already unfair game is just pushing it, but I understand it's a metroidvania. A marioidvaniia, if you will. If you as much as tip your toenail into another enemy you take damage from your 5 available health masks. Enemies teleporting next to you is just that much of a nice touch.

I also watched like 3 hours worth of guides, but it just won't add up in my little gamerbrain.

There's just people who can drive a Formula 1 car and those who don't.
There's people who can beat all of Dark Souls and those who don't.
There's people who gush over Hollow Knight and those who do not.


Edit on 6/14 after beating the game: I still do not recommend the game to anyone. I think there's a special level in Hell for Hollow Knight stans. Somewhere right between feet fetishists and bug-likers.
If you still do play the game and struggle, watch speedrunners. It's refreshing to see even them fail to random attacks, and along that entertainment you pick up some dirt that gets you through the game. After that it's all up to you.

First playthrough:
Hey this game is really fun, but I keep getting steamrolled by biblically accurate angel mechs.

Second playthrough:
Maybe I should equip something that is not the FOTM. Lasers?? Less weight = higher speeds??? So the pointy stick really does damage, huh? Adding kicks to your attack patterns does what?

Third playthrough:
I CAN FLY
I FLY HIGH

First time I lasted 2 minutes.
It got progressively better and more addicting.
It's just like sex, but better.

-buggy
-boring
-bootleg looking ass

The game is full of bugs. Once I get enough money for a weapon upgrade, it won't let me buy the gun. if the girl dies there's like a 50-50 chance you get a male death sound. (intentional Trap- deepest lore???) Enemy hitboxes, for both death animation and attack, are insanely huge. Sometime you get hit after you ran half the screen away from a mob. Even if the mob despawned you shoot at a block of air and can't hit the enemy behind.

I recommend you uninstall this and get Homura Combat somewhere online. It's at least enjoyable, not lewd but it's a solid game with the same gun girl fights off hoards of mobs premise.

+learned a lot of dubious trivia
+free gift
-terrible pacing
-the art is so-so

Listing a Hentai game as a source is not academically accepted when writing your thesis. The game itself is a simple quiz, but if you pick an answer you have to wait five seconds for a part of the clothes to disappear. Some questions lack objective answers, some are at least funny.

I give the game a 20 minutes wasted out of a 3 second google image search of "anime tiddies"

Puzzles make dong contract and brain go hurt, but demon girls make dong expand and brain go off.
Music is really catchy even though it was made by some guy who makes furry porn flash games.

Something died deep down inside of me along the way, but I finished the game.

That something was the human aspect of suffering. While fighting the final boss the voice of hurt steadily grew more silent inside of me, until after about the 33rd attempt it ceased to echo. After that my frown turned into an eternal smile. I have broken out of the wheel of suffering and reached enlightenment.

I give the game 1 smiling Sekiro out of 10 sad ones.
Would definitely recommend.

Only those who have not broken the cycle will find the review confusing.

The loot is worse than in Diablo 3.

At least this game isn't getting a phone port.
10/10