postmaschine » Games » Genital Jousting Stats

Playtime past 2 weeks:
0h

View global achievement stats
You must be logged in to compare these stats to your own
10 of 28 (36%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

Go Left

Move to the left.
Unlocked 3 Jan, 2019 @ 1:40am

Go Right

Move to the right.
Unlocked 3 Jan, 2019 @ 1:40am

Fire Inspector

Safely deploy all the fire extinguishers. For safety.
Unlocked 3 Jan, 2019 @ 3:19am

Master Unlocker

Collect enough milk to fill the tank.
Unlocked 11 Dec, 2024 @ 2:15pm

Always Finishes First

Good at video games. Terrible at sex.
Unlocked 11 Dec, 2024 @ 1:13pm

Generous Lover

Finish last in a Party Mode game.
Unlocked 25 Jan, 2019 @ 11:09am

Spare Wheel

Be the only one locked out of an ouroborus.
Unlocked 23 Feb, 2019 @ 12:55pm

The Perfect Partner

Marry yourself in Abstinence.
Unlocked 11 Dec, 2024 @ 2:14pm

Magnetic Basshole

Win Lights Out in under five seconds.
Unlocked 11 Dec, 2024 @ 1:10pm

Autopaedicatio

Penetrate yourself in Traditional Mode.
Unlocked 25 Jan, 2019 @ 1:27pm



Most Improved Tapulator

Learn how to literally just navigate the main menu.

Early Bird

Swallow every worm.

Sleep No More

Don't let sleeping dongs lie.

Self Defence

Use the cake knife to defend yourself from wedding guests.

Swan Tamer

Make peace with a gaggle of swans. Their natural instinct is to kill.

Bulking Gear

Use all the "supplements" you can for maximal gains.

Paperwork

Submit your monthly physical report.

Popcorn Buffet

Eat a disgusting amount of popcorn.

Clumsy

Die a lot of times in your nightmares.

Couch Party

Have enough friends and enough controllers to play an 8 player game.

My Precious

Get all of the rings in Lord of the Rings.

Safety First

Everyone survives having sex in a trash-compactor full of needles.

Till Death Do Us

Have sex in the Date Night graveyard.

Fussy Lover

Save yourself for that special orgy.
+4

4 hidden achievements remaining

Details for each achievement will be revealed once unlocked