──────▄▌▐▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▌
───▄▄██▌█ beep beep
▄▄▄▌▐██▌█ gay porn delivery
███████▌█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▌
▀(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀(@)(@)▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀(@)▀

Microsoft Office Excel is just the bustiest boy in town. Everyone notices it, specifically Me dog. Excel's brain had become corrupted by Jeff's jubilant jubblies, so badly that he would follow Jeff around whilst drooling over himself and making aggressive suction noises. One day, when Jeff's bouncy bags had become extra swollen looking, Microsoft Office Excel had decided that he had enough. When Jeff turned the corner he dumped a boiling hot pot of chili all over his chest. Some dripped down on his feet, so Excel offered to suck his toes to make him feel better. Jeff graciously accepted, his precious bosoms perked up with delight. Excel slurped Jeff's fat toes, and flicked the chili beans between them with his tongue. Jeff's excitement caught up to him, he sprouted an erection which fit perfectly in the rolls of Excel's neck, while his shirt dripped with delicious dairy.
Me J3ff, Can Confirm.

░░░░██▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░██▄
░░░▄█████▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▀░░▄████▌
░░░██▀░███░░░░░░░░▐█▌▄▄▄░▐█▌░███▀██▌
░░▄██▄▄███░█████░░██████░▐██▐██
░░██████▀▄██▄▄▄█░▐██▀░██░▐██▐████
░███░░██░███▀▀▀▀░▐█▌░░██░███▀▀▀██
▄███▄██▀░▀████▌░░▀▀▀░░░░░▀▀░░░░██
▐███▀▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░██▄███
░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█████▀
░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▀

　⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡶⢶⣦⡀
⠀⠀⠀⣴⡿⠟⠷⠆⣠⠋⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿
⠀⠀⠀⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣷⣦⣀⣠⣾⡿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⡿⠟
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⠀⠀⠀⢠⠏⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀　　　
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⢦⡀⠇⠀⠀⣀⠞⠀⠀⠘⡀⢀⡠⠚⣉⠤⠂⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢦⡀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠉⠒⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢧⠔⣉⠤⠒⠒⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣆
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⣤⠶⠶⢶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡆
⠀⣀⠤⠒⠒⢺⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⠊⠀⢸⠀⡿⠀⡀⠀⣀⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇
⠈⠀⠀⣠⠴⠚⢯⡀⠐⠒⠚⠉⠀⢶⠂⠀⣀⠜⠀⢿⡀⠉⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠟
⠀⠠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠂⣴⠒⠒⣲⢔⠉⠉⣹⣞⣉⣈⠿⢦⣀⣀⣀⣠⡴⠟

In a fight? Here is what you do, my friend.

Bring your chin down to protect your neck while continuing to stare in his eyes. Bring up your hands and say "I don't want no trouble ya hear". Flex your traps and core. Slightly bend your knees.

Here comes the important part. In a low voice begin to say "wolowolowolowolowolo" slowly increasing in volume. He should be surprised by now. Begin to sway side to side and loosen all facial muscles and your anal sphincter and your kegal muscle. By now you should be pretty loud and your opponent will have stepped back and appear visibly shaken.

Begin to piss and ♥♥♥♥ yourself and let your eyes roll to the back of your head. By now, you're chanting "WOLOWOLOWOLOWOLO" at the top of your lungs.

He will run away. Everyone within a one mile radius will feel a terrifying presence within their soul.

Marvel as you ascend into your planar form.

. ∧＿∧　
（ ºωº )つ━☆・*。
⊂|　　 | 　　　・゜+.
　しーＪ　　　°。+ *´¨)
　　　　　　　　　.• ´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
　　　　　　　　　　(¸.•´ (¸.•'* ☆加我兄弟 ☆