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Anyone on?

"I was talking to Mom, but then my dad wanted to watch TV for a bit, then my sister wanted to go to walmart at 12:30 and after that I promised my friend i would play War Thunder. I started to get really tired, but then i started feeling really sick, and then i got a kidney stone."

BREAKING NEWS

RUMORS that Asa is advocating for "Mandatory Man-on-Man Mustache Ride Mondays" are running rampant on social media. Are these rumors true? Stay tuned for our exclusive interview with Asa himself, where we will ask him YOUR questions! As always, this PSA is brought to you by MUSTACHENEWS DOT COM!

THIS: Asa has been spotted hitting the griddy off beat to fein by Travis Scott. If you see him report him immediately to the police.

THIS JUST: Asa has been spotted throwing PLUTONIUM-239 at small children on top of daycare's with Chinese nationalist Ia Mfree Kee