Recent reviews by Catfo0od

I played this game when it came out on xbox, installed 3 discs for it, and I remember being bummed at the ending. But since I really like the adventure genre and the noire film genre, I wanted to give it another run through. Wow, worse than I remember. You play as a piece of dry white toast shoved into a detective uniform. The miniscule amount of plot was hamfisted, just crammed in there like a clue in a dead guys hand (that you can't help but find, because the gameplay is simpler than Put Put Goes To The Moon), and you're so disconnected from the character that you can't feel anything for him.

I've heard internet dweebs say the ending was "in noire fashion" or that the game is bad because "you don't understand noire" well, coming from a fan of the genre, this was as noire as Bob the ****ing Builder. Noire is supposed to be gritty, filled with introspection, shots of the character when they're not really supposed to be seen, point out the flaws of the characters and their traits. This checks none of the boxes. You learn next to nothing about the character or how he sees the world, he has no narrative about the justice system, you don't see the bright-eyed, by-the-book rookie slowly become a dissilusioned, grizzled cop. The ending is so horrible I want to buy a disc copy so I can demand my money back, the characters are so one-dimensional they can't even really be cliches, as cliches at least have traits.

The gameplay is garbage, reading the facial expressions is cool, but if you pick "lie" and you choose an almost identical piece of evidence to the correct one, it's somehow wrong. If you pick "doubt", which seems like the slightly less confrontational choice, you call an old lady a "nosy old hag" (which was the right choice apparently.) Oh, and any of those GTA things you do when you're tired of the game, y'know mayhem, murder, all the fun stuff, you literally can't do in this game. The world is as boring as you're truly GARBAGE character.

It really could've been good, too. A couple personal missions where you see your character give into his vices, some internal or external monologues (maybe during one of the bajillion silent car rides across LA) about the system or humanity or criminality, maybe an ending that isn't entirely forced and underwhelming, the ability to blow ♥♥♥♥ up, and it could've been stellar. They **** the bed with this one. Bummer.

If you're thinking of buying this game for nostalgia purposes, please for the love of all that is holy, don't. If you like gritty detective games, maybe check out my favorite adventure game of all time The Wolf Among Us or the infintely more noire-themed series than this, Sam and Max. Or play Candy Crush, somehow that has a more fleshed out plot than this.

1/10, and it only gets the 1 because the scenery is pretty good.

Played on steam and 360. I can safely say this is the worst AC game, possibly the worst game PERIOD, that I have had the misfortune of playing. If you like monotonous tailing missions, frequently interrupted by monotonous sneaking missions around an office building and playing godawful 'hacking' minigames, then look no further. The ONLY redeeming factor is getting to plunder ships while your crew sings sea shanties, but god forbid they actually make that into a real mission. And even that is disappointing. This game's terrible, I don't know how anyone would find this enjoyable, and I don't know how a company could so lazily slap together a game and stick it out there. And as a tremendous fan of all things pirate, I wanted to love it, but I just can't bring myself to overlook EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF THE GAME. I'll go back to Sid Meiers Pirates, which seems to still be the only half decent pirate game on the market.

major fan of Clerks, Jay&Silent Bob, Dogma, and basically all of that stuff. but this game is seriously just like having a bad monday over and over again. all you gotta do is click on everything and wince your way through sub-par and annoying dialogue. if anything Randal is to Randal-ey than the real Randal. so much potential.

good game, though i think it could be done better. after the wolf among us, i figured this would be awesome. well it didnt live up to that expectation, but its pretty fun. you may find yourself constantly yelling at the screen because of the characters stupid decisions, and you may laugh at how stupid it is to say, have a massive group argument in the middle of a zombie infested city, or not check behind something that you OBVIOUSLY shouldve. but fun ride altogether, much like a zombie movie.

played a million times, best game telltale has ever made! very much like the comics, but also the best Harry Bosch-esque take on a detective. very gritty, very noir, very intense. just waiting for season 2.

i paid $2.42 for this game. I wouldnt pay a dollar for it. funny concept, but its really just a weird, choppier version of an already weird and choppy game.

i left the game paused for about a half day or so, so id say 8-12hrs of play time. the gameplay was damn decent but repetitive. the story had a lot more potential than the game lived up to. the ending...i have to say i saw it coming and it kinda upset me that it wasnt as mind-blowing as it shouldve been. id give the game a 7/10 cause it was worth the play but didnt live up to my expectations. play this game but dont spend a lot on it.