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Recent reviews by ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡ °)

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Showing 1-10 of 16 entries
7 people found this review helpful
28.7 hrs on record
Had avoided buying Bloodstained all these years because screenshots and videos of its gameplay simply looked ugly to me. Finally caved in after looking at 94% positive reviews and bought it with a 75% discount.

Maybe i'm simply so spoiled by all those wonderful indie metroidvanias from more recent years that my desire for comfort (common QOL features like auto/custom map markers and at least some kind of progression route clues) now greatly outweighs my nostalgia for Castlevania, but i regret spending even that little money on this one. Bloodstained is a 2019 game that somehow plays (and looks) so much worse than the ~early 2000s games that it tries so hard to replicate, not to mention various metroidvanias released around the same time as it did.

Movement feels clunky. Miriam moves slowly and her backstep is useless because its distance is way shorter than most of enemies and bosses' attack range. Combined with messy hitboxes and contact damage it turns combat into a chore. Bosses are entirely unmemorable. The castle's layout is boring. Map is barely any help when it comes to backtracking - there are no auto markers other than save rooms and portals, and a single type of custom marker which you get a limited number of. Visuals, on top of being unpleasant in general (everything looks like it's covered in a thick layer of grease), are very inconsistent in style and quality between areas, some of them straight up look unfinished. Character designs - which look very good in hand-drawn promotional artwork! - look horrendous as 3D models, with the single exception being the protagonist. At some point story progression gets locked behind rng - a spell that has a 10% chance to drop from a random enemy - and there are no clues given about this, none whatsoever.

Plus there are more Castlevania references and annoying, out-of-place easter eggs for kickstarter backers packed into this thing than there's original plot and lore. It's like a checkbox of various features copied from the franchise as-is, with absolutely nothing new or unique added to the mix, which makes it feel even more like an inferior imitation rather than a proper spiritual successor.

Figured i'd try getting all achievements anyway just because eh why not, Bloodstained is mediocre but it's not the worst game i've ever played (definitely one of the ugliest though, the contrast between its promotional artwork and the real ingame graphics is unreal), but later discovered that 100%ing Bloodstained requires purchasing a DLC of a separate campaign that costs almost as much as what i already paid and yeah, no, i'm not spending any more money or time on this.
Posted 11 February. Last edited 14 February.
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1 person found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
1.1 hrs on record
I shook (and squeezed) the rat's tiny little body, but the rat shook (and squeezed) my very soul. 10/10, would shake (but not squeeze) the rat again.
Posted 26 November, 2024.
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1 person found this review helpful
25.2 hrs on record (12.5 hrs at review time)
Fellow bearers of the curse (adhd & executive dysfunction) weren't lying, this game can help to make a functional human being out of a chronic procrastinator. Got it on a sale about 2 weeks ago and personally i find it very helpful, so now i keep it running on the background pretty much all day long (in offline mode, hence the relatively low number of hours i have).

Spirit City is exactly what it says on the tin: a simple gamified productivity app. Productivity tools include pomodoro timer, a bunch of calming music playlists, a selection of ambient sounds, a journal, a habits tracker, and a to-do list.
◌ Pomodoro allows to set up a timer for up to 5 work sessions. My one complaint about this tool is that currently there's only one sound that indicates the end of sessions and breaks both, and if you don't pay attention you might not notice that the entire cycle has ended a while ago.
◌ Music selection is nice. There's also an option to play music from youtube via a built-in web browser. Unfortunately, no option to select local files.
◌ Ambient sounds include stuff like rain, night, birds, running water and white/pink/brown noise. Some options come with visual effects which can be toggled on/off separately - like dark rainy weather or a burning fireplace.
◌ Can't comment on the other three tools as i don't use them at all.

"Gameplay" is essentially a background filler - you design an avatar and pick a spirit companion for them, then place them somewhere in the room where they sit repeating a short animation like reading on the bed or meditating on the baywindow.
◌ You can get daily exp for 1) launching the game, 2) completing 1 timer, 3) completing 1 task from your to-do list, and 4) simply keeping the game running.
◌ Exp gets you ingame currency which is used strictly for visual customization: to buy new clothes for the avatar, various color schemes for spirit companions, and furniture for different parts of the room.

That's it, that's the game. Does what it was designed for quite fine, especially considering how cheap it is.
Posted 21 September, 2024.
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6 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
144.6 hrs on record (104.7 hrs at review time)
If you're thinking about buying Dread Delusion - please do, it is a truly unique, fantastic game.

But for the love of god, BACKUP YOUR SAVEFILE. Unfortunately the game isn't free of game-breaking bugs and there's only a single (auto)save slot per character, so you're at risk of losing all your progress.
DD savefiles are located at "C:\Users\name\AppData\LocalLow\Lovely Hellplace\Dread Delusion"

Devs continue to release bug fixes though, so yeah, despite technical issues it still gets a thumbs up from me ( '-')b
Posted 28 July, 2024.
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84 people found this review helpful
3 people found this review funny
2
0.5 hrs on record
For about 5-6 months after the game's release the publisher, Nixon, had been responding to every negative review which mentioned bad performance with a link to their (completely useless) FAQ and promises of an optimization patch - except that it's been over a year since the release, and there's been none.

Turns out people weren't exaggerating when they complained about the lack of optimization in this game. It's practically non-existent. Giving it thumbs down based purely on the horrid performance on my pc - which can run Lies of P on high/ultra with no fps drops whatsoever, but at the same time chokes on the lowest settings in Steelrising, making it pretty much unplayable.
Posted 16 November, 2023. Last edited 28 February, 2024.
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11 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
290.6 hrs on record (253.4 hrs at review time)
A good metroidvania with a very clear Soulsborne influence and a grim story that follows the "show (in collectible notes and item descriptions), not tell" rule.

Pros:
- A huge world with its own history, plenty of npcs that have a lot to say about each other and react to current events.
- Many sidequests, some have Consequences.
- Looks good, sounds good. Cool boss designs.
- A lot of platforming, albeit somewhat simplistic. A lot of stuff to find and collect in each area.
- Large build variety. Four main weapon types (swords, axes, daggers, bows), many spells and consumables to use. Respec is available. Also has pretty decent Fashion Souls. You can play dress up with the protagonist, there's plenty of gear to be collected and even 3 hairstyles to choose from.
- The game is stingy with money and upgrade materials at the start, but in the second half of the game you can comfortable try out different weapons and upgrade armor.
- Replayability and NG+ mode. There's a lot of well hidden collectibles, a number of sidequests have different outcomes and rewards, and understanding the story definitely requires more than one playthrough.
- The drawn map is fantastic, and there's a spell that can be found roughtly mid-game that can reveal all not yet collected items (except for one type of them) and which makes backtracking less of a chore than it could've been. Quest journal is present, albeit kinda messy.
- Savepoint/fast travel points are placed relatively well, not too close and not too far from each other to become an annoyance.
- There's a catboy.

?
- Combat is relatively simple and kinda relaxing even on the hardest difficulty (which can be changed at any point anyway), which can be a pro for everyone who's there for story and exploration, and a disappointment for everyone who enjoys getting killed in a single hit.
- Maingame and optional bosses aren't very hard, even the final boss, but DLC bosses are a massive difficulty spike.
- Imo the decision to hide almost the entire story behind optional collectibles is questionable. For example, the 'mystery' behind the prologue sequence is explained by a single piece of gear that is a non-guaranteed drop from a hidden optional boss, and is never mentioned anywhere else. Even if you go out of your way to read every single item description and find every note you will find that there's plenty of story bits that get no explanation, not even vague hints. There also appear to be some mistranslations here and there that add to the confusion. Vigil is a very story-driven game with plenty of dialogue and action (well, for a metroidvania), but at time the game acts like actually knowing its story is a crime.

Cons:
- ^ As a result, Vigil can be hard to play with long breaks between sessions. It's confusing enough even when you're trying to actively pay attention.
- Small bugs, although afaik nothing actually game-breaking.
- A couple of technical issues, too. For example, remapping a controller's buttons can be a problem, as it also affects menus in a weird way. By remapping certain buttons you can get yourself stuck in a menu, unable to exit it with the controller. Doesn't affect the keyboard afaik.
- Some areas appear to be huge just for the sake of being huge, while not much is actually going in them in terms of environmental hazards, platforming, or enemy variety. It can get repetetive.
- Has some combat balancing issues, certain spells and weapons are too op, others feel kinda useless. Status effects are barely explained.
- A lot of shortcuts are absolutely useless thanks to the abudance of savepoints which also operate as fast travel stations. Some of them lead back to already 100% explored areas.
- Certain achievement descriptions are incorrect ("collect all weapons/armor/etc" - actually require only those that were present on launch back in 2020). The achievement that requires to get to lvl 161 to obtain all skills requires serious grind even 3-4 NG cycles in with a bunch of EXP up rings.

Overall, a 7/10 game. It's fun to play and you can tell that a lot of love was put into it, but the lack of polish is visible in a lot of places.
Posted 6 November, 2022. Last edited 6 November, 2022.
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44 people found this review helpful
12 people found this review funny
0.2 hrs on record
A cute fox with a teacup on its head: check
Throwable breadsticks: check
Making me feel like a clown for failing to perform a chain of 4 walljumps for like 20 attempts: check, unfortunately

10/10 game
Posted 5 November, 2022. Last edited 5 November, 2022.
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4 people found this review helpful
22.4 hrs on record
Minoria is small, simple, fun, and good looking metroidvania. I can't list pros and cons separately, as a lot of things in the game can be called either depending on what you're looking for in a game.

- A genuinely beautiful game with a very cute art style and visuals; satisfying to look at from start to finish. Flashing attack animations can sometimes obscure the screen a bit too much, but all enemies have an indicator to when they're about to attack, so it's not much of an issue.
- An interesting bit of a story, a small glimpse into a much bigger world. Most of worldbuilding and character backstories are told through collectible archives.
- Metroidvania aspect is rather simplistic. There's some exploration to be done, a bit of easy platforming to do, and a bunch of secret items to collect, but overall game/map progression is linear. Leveling up does pretty much nothing, you get killed at ~3 hits at any point of the game.
- The combat is a bit of a mixed bag. The basic hit/dodge/parry formula holds up well and controls are responsive, but that's pretty much it, doesn't get any deeper. Or harder.
- There's a lot of active and passive spells to collect, although personally i found most of active spells useless. They have too few charges, deal too little damage, and swapping them requires to pause the game which imo breaks the flow of combat. Passive spells and buffs are good, though.
- Blocking/parrying is straight up broken. It has a VERY generous window, a very short start-up animation, and allows you to block/parry all projectiles on top of melee attacks...which on one hand makes combat a lot more forgiving, but on the other hand you can literally just stand in one place and button mash to block/parry repeatedly, taking zero damage even from long-lasting laser beams and massive AOEs, both of which can be a nightmare to rolldodge properly.
- Good boss variety. The amount feels right for a game this size and none feel like filler (both gameplay- and story-wise), but imo they're all too easy on their own, and the blocking thing trivializes encounters even further.
- You get cool rewards for finishing boss fights without getting hit, which is a good motivator to learn them (it is completely optional though, you aren't forced to do that).

Overall, if you want a short and chill game with a touching story, this is it. If you're looking for a more hardcore challenge with a high gameplay variety, play something else.
Posted 19 February, 2022.
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4 people found this review helpful
0.0 hrs on record
I don't know how i feel about Fatesworn. On one hand i'm glad that THQ tried to add something new to a ten years old game and even went as far as hiring old voice actors when they didn't have to do either. On the other hand, the overall quality of the dlc also makes me wish they didn't. I tried my best to enjoy Fatesworn, but couldn't. It has a promising start but quickly devolves into completely pointless, exhausting grind with no reward for it. The only two compliments i have for the Fatesworn is that the new area, Mithros, looks truly beautiful and has an interesting level design; and that it was really nice to hear familiar voices again. That's it. I don't have anything else.

Can't say anything about technical side of things. I've seen people mention serious bugs and constant crashes but personally (and luckily) i was able to 100% the dlc without any issues. Battle music not playing here, a couple of quest items getting permanently stuck in the inventory there. Check steam forums for more info.
(Also there already was patch 1 so developers are still on it)

Now to the bad:
- Missable achievement. I know og Amalur had at least one of those as well but y'know, a small warning just in case.

- Main story is next to non-existent. On top of openly contradicting the game's original ending, there's just very little story in general, with good 50% of it being told in the opening cinematic. Sidequests are okay-ish, but nothing deep either. And there's no lore books. None. You enter Mithros knowing nothing and leave none the wiser. The entire expansion feels more like a side quest itself than a grand ending to a fabled hero's story.

- Only two (or three? i think two) new enemy types; one of them you rarely ever see, the other is everywhere. You spend the entire dlc fighting the same niskaru, boggarts, and spiders, with an occassional troll thrown in for enrichment. Except they're purple now.

- No combat balance whatsoever. Despite Fatesworn being a post-game dlc that cannot be accessed before completing KoaR's main quest almost nothing can hurt you and you kill everything in a just a couple of hits, even on the highest difficulty. Which might actually be a good thing because of the next point.

- (Gameplay mechanics spoilers, kind of) The worst part of the dlc is forced grind. The purple enemy recolors mentioned above have armor, and and the only way to get weapons that can break it is to repeatedly do TES4's Oblivion Gates-style dungeons and then re-craft your weapon once every X dungeons to increase its damage. Which, by the way, renders all unique weapons you can otherwise find in the expansion completely useless by default as they don't have that damage type.
7 mandatory dungeons are located in Mithros; 18 more are optional and are spread through the rest of Amalur (you get an achievement for completing all 25). In order to unlock them you first have to close nearby "portals" that are guarded by the same 4 purple enemies. The dungeons themselves aren't unique (they're combined from a bunch of map pre-sets and range from very short to unnecessary long), and - once again - are filled with the same recolors and nothing else.

All of that is incredibly tedious, adds no value to the story whatsoever, and very obviously exists solely to increase gameplay length. I had enough of those dungeons by the time i finished, like, 3 of them. There was no need for even seven, and definitely not twenty five. I still ended up doing all 25 because i wanted my stupid achievement, and without exaggeration hated every second of it.

Summary? Imo not worth the full price. Gets extremely tiring and tedious gameplay-wise, with no interesting story or characters to serve as a motivation to slog through its worst parts. Not the kind of ending i hoped to see for one of my favorite games but, eh, even if i can't recommend Fatesworn THQ still deserves some praise for not abandoning KoAR after acquiring rights to it. Most other publishers would.
Posted 25 December, 2021. Last edited 25 December, 2021.
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97 people found this review helpful
2 people found this review funny
9
3
174.2 hrs on record (14.9 hrs at review time)
KoA:R-R is pretty much the exact same game, but with some good gameplay tweaks. If you played it before and loved it - you'll like the changes. If you hated the game back then - absolutely nothing that made you hate it was improved. If you're new - read a couple of reviews on the original KoA:R (but disregard "you get overleveled very fast" parts) to see what it's about.

+ Exp gain has been adjusted, loot rebalanced, areas now scale up to their level cap instead of being permanently locked to the level you enter them at the first time.
+ With introduction of Very Hard difficulty and improved enemy scaling it is now actually possible to break your weapon before finding a better one - and even die!
+ All original DLCs, which are fantastic, are included in the regular edition.

? Graphical upgrade is nothing breathtaking. Some improved textures here, some changed lighting and upped contrast there.
? 50% discount for owners of original KoA:R on steam that lasted until november and stacked with 10% launch discount. Some argue that the remaster should've been given to owners of the original for free - something that THQ Nordic had done for Darksiders 1/2 and Titan Quest remasters.

- Nasty bugs have been reported. New bugs (yeh!), old bugs (meh). Devs been working on patching them, though.
- Performance issues and fps drops.
- Fatesworn DLC is...kinda bad. Very bad, imo.

Overall, it's an okay-ish re-release of a good game that didn't age that badly at all. Definitely worth to get at 60% discount for old fans. New players - be wary that its still a 2012 game. Re-Reckoning a remaster, not a remake.
Either way, maybe wait for performance patches first.
Posted 11 September, 2020. Last edited 19 February, 2022.
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Showing 1-10 of 16 entries