Hi, I’m Brendan Stewart

My Colleagues and I, self-proclaimed brothers in mewing, have accomplished one of the greatest feats in modern history. This was something unheard of, something that could mold the world into a perfect jawli— I mean Utopia…. We have founded our very own collegiate experience for creating the most beautiful and perfect version of yourself. The Higher Institute of Mewing Science, or HIMS. At HIMS, we take pride in the fact that we can teach the new generation so much about our past of looksmaxxing and the human will to be upmost “pulcher”. Pulcher is Latin for beautiful and it is the only word we will use to describe our end destination. Speaking of words we will always be using if you were ever so inclined to be a part of our holy institute, here at HIMS we have a rather interesting outlook on authority. While my partners and I refer to ourselves as more commonly accepted titles such as Professor or Doctor, at HIMS we will only respond to “Mewing Maestro”, or “Maestros of Mewing”. This is because while we believe that authority is important, no one shall be gatekept from becoming a maestro. Money or status can’t keep one from achieving the title “Mewing Maestro”. The only step necessary in becoming one of us, is reaching your most “Pulcher” self. All your grades will revolve around that alone.

// Personal Titles and Practices
-Dean Stewart. Principal of The Higher Institute of Mewing Science
-Doctor Stewart Professor. Class: United States History of Mewing
-Doctor Stewart MD. Practice: “Pulcher Orthotropic Transitions”

// Colleagues Titles and Practices
-Professor Perry. Classes: Inner-workings of Mewing Thermodynamics
-Doctor Carter MD. Practice: “Bone Smash Clinic of Western Missouri”
-Doctor Carter Professor. Class: “Intro to Bone Smashing”










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