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For all my life, or at least as long as I can remember, I have had an erection. Throughout every happy time, every sad moment, every memory has been shared with my massive 2-inch hard-on. It's always been there for me, never leaving me, always pointing me the right way onward. And now, I came across this profile and achieved the impossible. You killed my erection. You condemned it to a life of flaccidity, of nothingness. I have been weeping for the past hour over the death of my one true friend. You monster. You killed throbzilla.