Aye dunt evin no
( ͡ಠ ͜ʖಠ)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCOVUz0SZAQ






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CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█

Item #: SCP-57-J

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-57-J is to be kept in a Cheezborgor-lined containment chamber located in North Korea, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 4 Doodles armed with DIamond.

In the event that SCP-57-J ever begins relaxing its Left leg, Old Man Jenkins is to RAN SCP-57-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force ZEUUUUUUZZZZZZZ-7 (''SPONGU BOBBURUUUUUUUUUUUUUU'') is to be dispatched to SCP-57-J's last known location.

Description: SCP-57-J is a Indifferent HIPPPER. Like most members of its species, it is able to POKING THE THINGY, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Cheezborgor each day.

SCP-57-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with THINGY, which causes it to turn into THINGY. Whenever this happens, all THINGY within a 1000000000000000000000000000000 kilometer radius will begin to POKE uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.

In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Shia LeBouf. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-57-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.

Recovery Log: SCP-57-J was first located in Lazy Town where the The Rams were using it in order to Kill Superman. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force ZEUUUUUUZZZZZZZ-7 (''SPONGU BOBBURUUUUUUUUUUUUUU'') was able to recover the object with only 666 civilian casualties.

Addendum: Test Log 57-1

Dr. wienerstien: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr wienerstien, and I am about to test SCP-57's reaction to IPhone 6 PRUS. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr KaDoodle?

Dr. KaDoodle: Yes sir, ready to begin test.

Dr. wienerstien: Excellent! I am now introducing the IPhone 6 PRUS to 57... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.

Dr. KaDoodle: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.

wienerstien: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Right rarm! IT'S GOT MEIN