𝕝𝕚𝕗𝕖 𝕚𝕤 𝕒 𝕘𝕒𝕞𝕖, 𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕒𝕞 𝕝𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕝 𝕚𝕤 𝕙𝕠𝕨 𝕨𝕖 𝕜𝕖𝕖𝕡 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕣𝕖 ♛

⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⡀⢀⣠⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄
⢀⣾⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣦⢻⡿⠟⠿⣿⣿⣦⡹⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣦⠹⠿⠿⣿⣿⣧⡀
⠸⠿⠿⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⡇
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⡿⠁⠄⢀⣴⣿⡿⠁
⠄⠄⢀⣠⣾⣿⠟⢋⣴⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡿⠋⣠⣾⣿⠟⠋⠄⣠⣶⣿⠿⠋⠄⠄
⠄⣰⣿⡿⠋⠄⠈⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⢀⡾⣡⣾⣿⠋⠁⠄⢠⣾⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄
⢰⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣌⠻⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⢱⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠂⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⡆
⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁
𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐍𝐞𝐰 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝!

Best tank driver I ever had. Best job I ever had. We've killed many a tanks together. But he still loves to eat black bean paste as a snack inside the tank...smells like ♥♥♥♥.

January 23rd, 2010.

I was playing Command and Conquer like I do every Tuesday night with a couple of randoms when one of them told me that I was really good and to join his Teamspeak Server and we could keep going. As soon as I joined, he told me that he didn't really want to play, but needed a Social Security Number for his friend "Liverspots", who was an illegal immigrant in our country. At first, I was very hesitant and told him that I don't even know you guys. He then told me that if he didn't have a Social Security number for his friend, that he would be deported back to Finland. I gave it to him - he immediately kicked me out of his Teamspeak server - I knew that something was majorly wrong.

January 26th, 2010.

As I was practicing for my journeymen plumbers license on a couple of pieces of PVC, roughly a bakers dozen hispanic men bust in my front door and drop kick every object in my house before finally stumbling upon me. I am flailing around on the ♥♥♥♥king floor trying not to get kicked by these mother♥♥♥♥♥♥ers and swinging a skimpy 1/2" wide 3 foot long piece of PVC at them. Keep in mind that each one of these guys was at a bare minimum - 6'8" tall.

After rolling around on the floor and attempting to dodge these guys leg blows, Kyle rides into my house on an electric scooter and runs right into my dads antique 4 foot bong - which contained his ashes that were to be spread around Lake Alan Henry. He jumped off the scooter, got right down next to my peckker and with his face approximately a half inch from it, spit his chewing tobacco right on the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ side of it (my shorts had obviously ridden down to about ankle level during this ridiculous assault). The last thing I remember, he said "You die, your brother dies, doesn't matter 'mongst me", and punched me in the ear with brass knuckles.