Recent reviews by qvir

yes, yes, a thousand times yes!

give the soundtrack some love on newgrounds, too: https://www.newgrounds.com/audio/listen/410082

I'm not going to write too much, especially given others' reviews.

Pay 2 win, pay 2 skin

I like Eternal Card Game better.

On a deeper level, I think Magic suffers as a video game because it will always be tied, at least on some level, to the tabletop cardboard-based game. Eternal (and other digital card games) do not suffer from this limitation and can thus fully explore the features that a fully digital experience offer. Alchemy doesn't count.

Full disclosure: I am probably not this game's target audience. Regardless of whether I am, though, I think good games are ones that can appeal to a broad spectrum of players and purposes. This is not one of those games.

First off, it has a mobile version, which is already a huge red flag. Microtransactions, pick-up-and-play braindead gameplay, Bloons TD 6 has it all. Even on the spectrum of casual games, Bloons TD 6 offers little in terms of satisfaction or relaxation. There are endless waves of enemies, and the bright neon color scheme or art style made to appeal to children does little to relax my eyes after a day of work. The game is not beautiful by any stretch of the imagination.

"Then why so many hours?" I hear the skeptics ask. A valid point, but one that only adds to my lack of recommendation for this title. In short, the game is exhausting, contrary to its casual gameplay. Much like an angsty teen, Bloons (and, on a broader scale, NinjaKiwi) is having an identity crisis. 17 different single-player game modes each for a whopping 68 maps, along with periodic special events and updates, not to mention the team/co-op modes, create a broad yet shallow gameplay loop that is boring at best and Sisyphean at worst. It's fun, sure, but only the first 10 times you play it. Then it's all the same thing.

All in all, the game is much like its namesake enemy. Large, impressive-looking balloons sally across the screen. Nice to look at, amusing to pop, and a bit better when enjoyed with friends. But the balloons contain nothing but hot air.

There's a reason it's on the list!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_video_games_considered_the_best

I have a beautiful piece of glasswork on my desk. It's fashioned after a piece of candy with a vibrant shade of dark navy blue with white stripes. Were I to try to eat that glass candy, however, I would soon find myself crunching down on, well, glass, ending up with a cracked tooth and maybe even with a trip to the hospital.

Gris captivates aesthetically, but fails in story and gameplay aspects. The opening sequence gave me goosebumps, and I was optimistic as I started playing. Slowly but surely, however, its flaws became apparent and I found myself wanting to quit multiple times. I tried really hard to like this game, even going so far as to give it another go a couple days later, but crunching down on glass candy, regardless of its pleasing aesthetics, will always end the same way.

I ended up refunding the game.

beautiful game, but terrible gameplay, story, dialogue, characters, etc.

can you beat the beat?

musical puns and spring buds

both bring pretty blooms
(✿◕‿◕)

infuriating!

are cyan and blue alike?

screen of black-streaked snow

TF2 is like that really cool friend whose parents abused him as a kid. He had to go into the (broken) foster care system, so you lost contact with him for several years.

You've grown older, and you receive a message from an empty-looking profile. There's not a whole lot of posts, but the profile picture is unmistakable. It's your old friend, and it looks like he's doing a lot better. He says he's in the area and wants to meet up.

The day arrives. You'd agreed you'd wait at a nearby park, but he's already sitting on a bench when you get there. You awkwardly smile and try to make some small talk, failing miserably. He's never really been much of a conversationalist, but his facial expressions have always been easy to read. You made the mistake earlier of trying to interact with him like the average joe, and you had forgotten over the years how much more important it is to give him some space. You can tell he's been trying to work up the courage to say something important, so you shut up for a bit.

He starts.

"Thank you for being my friend and agreeing to meet up with me. I'm sorry I didn't keep in touch all this time. You were one of the ones I really regret not contacting earlier. I never want to hurt other people like I've been hurt."

He pauses, takes a deep breath, and continues.

"You remember Valve (a strange nickname for his dad he's used for a while now)? Yeah, I got in contact with him, finally. He's still a greedy POS, but he's kicked his drinking habit, at least. Left mom, too, which is good for both of us. He's finally acknowledging me, and he sent me some cash to go to school. It's sort of weird, our relationship, y'know? Anyway, that's enough about that bastard."

He laughs wryly, shaking his head. He sighs and looks up at the mesmerizing afternoon sky. You follow his gaze, admiring the deep azure expanse. You're almost caught off-guard when you hear his voice again.

"You helped me a lot, anon. Kept me alive, some might say. I know I'm pretty messed up. I'm no immortal, and I'm not perfect. But I guess that just means we have to make the most of the time we've got left."

He stops looking up and locks eyes with you. This time, his expression is one of subtle sadness. He looks like he's about to cry. But he doesn't.

He smiles.