Recent reviews by cake

too early to say tbh, gonna have to play a little more

Very fun and so far a complete upgrade to the prior title. People are very furstrated with its release being buggy or not finished, but thats what they did for the Forest and it worked out very well. I don't think people know about Endnight Games as a company and write this off as a product of overhype. I truely believe if you are a fan of quick games that give you short bursts of entertainment you should probably play Minecraft or an FPS game, this is a long form survival game built for immersion and building - not for its gunplay and combat. If you are unsure of purchasing this, play The Forest for a few hours and maybe watch a story recap.

Its all too real when they dont like my mixtape so they amass an army to take it down

If you play enough get used to not pressing "Q" in other games thinking you'll shout and alert all enemies, and if you get used to other games where you press "Q" to switch weapons, I'm sure you'll have fun

Me: On horseback at night near a forest, fearing my life from Cumans
Lucas: "You may want to veer to the left"

Okay so I had to run from huge anime lolis as a Mandalorian

I was sitting at home getting a drink out of the fridge. It was a Friday night, it was cloudy and it was empty. The neighbours were usually bickering every few minutes but their white noise is lowered when the weekend comes around. My street is along a dead end with an open plot out the front so the view across my living room is bland and unsatisfactory. Not that I look out my window often that is. My friend was messaging me earlier about this new experience he had with this very game. Being a naive guy I laughed at the title. "Garfield Kart"? Is this some sort of joke? It was on special so I downloaded it. Very easy small file size. Took around 1 minute to download. I got my drink and placed it on my desk in the living room and turned off the lights. I don't know about everyone but playing games in the dark allows the screen to be more brighter than the settings can ever provide. So I sit in my comfy chair with my fingers resting on the keyboard and the mouse, each finger connecting to their usual places and my right hand on the mouse. The bright flashy title illuminates me as I sit and begin to giggle at this menu. Masterpiece? Psychological horror? Not knowing I was walking into the mouth of such a beast I clicked play and left the game on the default settings. A small introduction was given and soon I selected a race track and customised my car. I was about to proceed when my in-game name flickered. It was no longer my steam set username, but my real name. Intrigued, I went looking in the settings for some privacy option. I didn't want this game plastering my profile with updated badges and such. I dug through the audio settings and saw an option titled "white noise". I chuckled at such a setting but shrugged it off. Some people enjoy the quiet moaning of a fan or the crackle and sizzling of an old TV. I saved my settings even through I didn't end up tampering with anything and didn't feel too suspicious of my new name. The game started out as normal, I was Jon in a go-kart riding around the first level which was the town. It was very difficult at first, the very precise drifting mechanics and shortcuts... and especially that impossible to avoid U.F.O. power up. A few losses later the sky dimmed and the room got darker. The sound of rain soon eased into my ears covered by my headphones. Not being able to come first in any of the races I tried again, although this time the game got clever. The title of the map was the same as my neighbourhood. I felt a bit more on edge after this and decided to keep my eyes open for anything else that the game took from my location services. Soon enough, I turned the corner of the cartoony track and saw a familiar park in my area. A little shaken from this sight I pressed pause and navigated to the system settings. Not a single category about privacy was found, however some interesting other details came to light. Weather effects was something that jumped out since I haven't seen any races that had severe weather or any form of weather. I turned the slider off and saved not thinking much of it. I drove around the map and didn't notice anything too absurd or out of the ordinary. That is until I noticed the rain had stopped outside. I paused the game and looked out my living room window across to the empty plot. The rain had stopped. Feeling further creeped out I delved back into the specific settings and turned up the weather, back to its default setting at around half way. Keeping my eyes to the window I soon noticed rain phase in. Not as if it all slowly fell from the clouds, but as if it was rendered in. With increasing curiosity I went to the next section, audio. I turned up the white noise and didn't hear anything in the game at all. I un-paused, drove around the course and paused again. Needing to refill my drink I went back into my kitchen. I opened the fridge door and felt like I was back into my regular weekly routine. Then it hit me. My neighbours were talking more loud than before. I ran to the chair. I slid the setting up. The neighbours got louder. In shock I sat still with the drink in my hands, the rain pouring down and the neighbours drowning the silence. I blinked hard and told myself it was all impossible. How could a game do this? How could a Garfield racing game do this! I nervously laughed and decided to put my drink aside. I shrugged the unexplained events as something with the drink so I had some water to clear my head. I decided to finish the lap and quit the game to tell my friend I wasted my money. As the race continued I was gaining on first place when I got hit with a pie and ended up in 4th. 4th place soon came to last as the final bend was coming up. A bit unsatisfied, I expected to have lost the race but turning the corner made my hair stand on end. It was my street. I kept playing out of wonder and fear. Surely the game hadn't tapped into my privacy that much. It was absurd! However what terrified me the most was the racing path. It went along my street then through an alley way into the empty plot. Then, the race track took a hard turn and went directly through my house. Through my living room. Too astounded to stop I held the throttle. I soon heard the sounds of roaring engines and the sound of smashed glass and screams. Then it all stopped. The game crashed.
This game is nothing like you will ever play again.

Born underground, suckled from a teat of stone.
Raised in the dark, the safety of our mountain home.
Skin made of iron, steel in our bones,
To dig and dig makes us free!
Come on brothers sing with me!
-
I am a dwarf and I'm digging a hole
Diggy diggy hole, diggy diggy hole
I am a dwarf and I'm digging a hole
Diggy diggy hole, digging a hole!

So imagine this. You wait for around 4 years for a potentially amazing game that would outshine its competitors (Yoka-Laylee) and give some subtle nostalgia from the Super Mario and Banjo days. It finally comes out and gets masked by Cuphead and Oddysy.


I dont care if the other games wins awards, it should have gone to this.

This is what we deserved.

Worst game ever.


Played it when It first came out, Archer girl and Bomb King were too OP, fun, was a different play style than TF2. I used GMAIL to play, but after a year I come back and the game has turned to ♥♥♥♥. GMAIL not logging in, LINKS OF TERMS AND CONDITIONS NOT WORKING. LINKS TO RULES AND LINKS TO CHANGE PASSWORD AND EVEN PLAY NOT WORKING. The whole launcher is stuffed. I've tried both on my Trusty Mac and a retarted windows but both not working. Never buy this.