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Recent reviews by Saime

Showing 1-3 of 3 entries
2 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
17
3.6 hrs on record (0.3 hrs at review time)
Game instructions:
1.Press play game
2.wait till it loads
3.Press exit game
Congratz you prevented cancer from progresing
Posted 5 July, 2017.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
4 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
1,942.7 hrs on record (1,381.2 hrs at review time)
> Download the game.
> Enter your first match.
> Realize you don't know what you're doing.
> Die repeatedly.
> Just before you rage, you find the Ghastly Gibus hat.
> Since all the pro players have cool-looking hats, you are inspired.
> Die repeatedly in different game modes.
> Discover that you are getting a lot of kills as Pyro.
> Be mentally violated by other players calling you a "f2p gibus pyro".
> Get slightly better at the game.
> Die repeatedly.
> Leave the game.

*6 months later.*

> Start to discover TF2 videos on YouTube.
> Realize that there are more classes than just Pyro and Sniper.
> End up wanting to be a pro non-Pyro like all the cool YouTubers.
> Return to Team Fortress 2.
> Die repeatedly.
> Claim that you 'main' Pyro.
> Walk at people and light them on fire mindlessly for a few weeks. Or months.
> Start getting a good K/D ratio on a different class. (If it's Soldier, you can go die.)
> Succumb to peer-pressure and buy hats.
> Discover the Steam community market and buy more hats for less.
> Feel your skill strangely growing as you get more hats.
> More kills. Less deaths.
> You begin to discover the passive players of TF2. (Sandvich hoovies, spycrabs, box shpees, etc.)
> Develop a kindness and sense of friendship towards your fellow TF2 players.
> Start to top-score more often.
> You begin to care about the state of the game.
> Realize that Pyros are overpowered and pointless.
> Start to hate Pyros.
> Start to hate everyone.
> Start to hate the TF2 community.
> You hate everything and everyone, to the point where you start to kill passive players again.
> Ask yourself, "If I hate this game, why do I have ten unusuals and fifteen Australiums? What am I doing?"
> Look at your playtime and begin to hate yourself.
> You dislike yourself more than the game now.
> Contemplate suicide.
> Contemplate religion.
> Question the game.
> Binge-watch STAR_'s 2012-2013 TF2 videos to remind you of a simpler time.
> Sit down and think.
> Realize what you have become.
> Go into a mid-TF2 crisis.
> Except it's not mid-TF2 anymore. You have 1000 hours in-game.
> What is going on?
> WHAT IS TEAM FORTRESS 2?
> WHY DOES THE LIGHT LIE TO ME?
> Quit TF2 forever.
> Come back to it in a week and die to a gibus sniper who taunts after kill.
> Kill yourself.

Or maybe that was just my experience.
Oh well.

10/10 (Totaly not copy paste cuz i was lazy)
Posted 26 June, 2017.
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1 person found this review helpful
3,515.2 hrs on record (2,397.4 hrs at review time)
CS:GO Review
NO
Posted 1 January, 2017. Last edited 9 December, 2020.
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Showing 1-3 of 3 entries