Delet zis

WHAT??????????????????????????

matt shut up you're not funny at all

Hello Alkaizer, this is Hollywood director and producer Eddy Pasterino. We would like you and fowtini to star in our new movie: Naked Skorñorita. You will go the the inn and see fowtini lying in Leah’s bed and she will want your Skorn but you say “No Skornerrino” and topdeck her. Pls no hastalapasta baberino.

cube up headass

lmao who this doo think he is? lmaoooo boy if u gunn main dedede u aint never getting in the big leagues bucko XD

The rest of the units suck. Rooks can only move in 4 directions, same with Bishops. Boring. Also, whats up with the Knight? It has the most bizzare combat abilities of all the units. They're retardly hard to use cause they jump around like ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ to move and attack. The devs should have named this unit Ninja, since Knights didn't jump around like that in real life.
Worst part, is the king. You see, the devs decided that if your king gets captured, you instantly lose the game. W-T-F? This wouldn't be a problem, except that he can't move for crap. Seriously, the most important unit in the game can only move 1 space a turn? Good luck keeping him alive while every other unit in the game dances around him.
Unbalanced classes, lackluster gameplay, and not to mention repetitive 1 hour+ games. Chess is not worth the time or your money. Buy Final Fantasy Tactics or Disgaea instead.
3 out of 10.

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG developed by a bunch of monkeys.
Right away you'll notice Chess has no storyline. Instead, all you notice is the the White army and the Black army are fighting each other over a battlefield. Note the "a battlefield," because Chess only has one story map.
As for the actual combat, it's extremely dull. Each unit can kill another with only one hit. This means units with a real good movement ability dominate the field (more on that bellow). There aren't even any combat animations or anything that happens in combat. One unit moves on it's space and "captures" it, and the piece is removed from the game with no form of action or special effects.
Yawn.
Chess has ♥♥♥♥♥♥ class balance. The Queen is flat out overpowered while your actual front line units, the Pawns. can't do ♥♥♥♥. I think the developers were afraid that no one would use the female character so they buffed up her abilities really high but now theres no point in using any other unit.

kinder egg

stop

bigger egg

big egg

Unshaved: how big do you think this will be?
Camel: as big as your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Unshaved: woah
Camel: stretched to capacity
Unshaved: WOAH
Camel: on a tuesday
Unshaved: WO A H