I would describe myself as borderline hyper masculine. The philosophies of stoicism and conservatism are incredibly important to me and I try my hardest to live up to the standards they set. I promise this is all relevant, I believe a brief background is important because it amplifies the soft and sweet nature of what I am about to say. I do not usually give compliments in an outwardly vocal or emotional way, but this is always a question that I enjoy answering.

As an adult, I am always flattered by compliments from a gay man, even if they are said in a sexual nature, possibly even more so if they’re sexualized, if I am being truly honest. It feels good to know that others find some inherent attraction towards you, regardless of what that attraction is. Hell, What I am the most pleased with is when strangers show admiration for my social skills or thinking process, things which I wasn’t always comfortable in pursuing with success. When I was in my early/mid twenties (29 now), I cannot overstate how frequently gay guys would approach me and strike up conversations. As I’ve gotten closer to 30, the frequency of these compliments has diminished. This is either an indictment on my aging not being all that graceful, or an indictment of how shallow the gay community can be… hah, I’m kidding, but only slightly! Oh how the eyes can lust.

When engaging with a gay person who has either complimented me or hit on me, I always attempt to achieve several things. First and most importantly, it is very important to me to not impolitely or negatively reject the person in a way that may harm their confidence. I have a tremendous amount of respect for any gay man that has the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ balls to approach me and make a move, I’m not the most approachable looking guy! My resting face is quite scary and I am 2m tall! Of course, because I am a man, I understand the courage it takes to put yourself out there and be vulnerable when pursuing a mate, I’ve done it many many times and it is still not a walk in the park. So, immediately I have a level of respect for any gay man who does this. In my adult years, I now believe that the reason I may have dealt with several incredibly image harming rejections as a young teenager was so that I would understand how soul crushing it can be and not take it for granted when rejecting a courageous gay man.

My second most important engagement is to rather quickly make it known that I am straight and very flattered, but uninterested because of my own sexuality. Also, as a man, I understand how frustrating it can be to experience someone who leads you on to stoke their own ego or is too passive to bluntly let it be known that they are not interested. I would hate to blue ball you guys, ♥♥♥♥♥ awful. So, I’ll make it known early that I am not interested, but I’d say I almost always end up having relatively long conversations with these men and I genuinely enjoy talking to them about their own experiences compared to mine when seeking out sexual partners. As a guy, it’s not all that often that women will approach you in an explicitly sexual nature, so it’s beneficial to myself to experience that to better understand the psychology women encounter when rejecting us.

The last thing I’d say is, you guys are incredibly persistent and can be very upfront in your intentions, I admire the hell out of it. I do not enjoy an abundance of subtlety, I like to get to the point, gay men often do! Sometimes y’all can be a pain in the ass with your persistence, but I respect it non the less. It’s ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ tough being rejected and then literally immediately afterwards putting yourself in a situation to be rejected again. That ♥♥♥♥ takes balls!

All in all, I hope the compliments I receive from gay men do not continue to decline because at times they can change my mood from gloomy and self conscious to boldly self confident almost instantaneously. Of course, I’ll continue engage with you guys in the friendliest way I know how!